Im falling apart. I need relationship advice asap!?

my boyfriend and I have been together for almost three years. we have had our ups and downs but for the most part we have been really happy. Lately he seems more distant. we used to talk about the future all the time and know when i talk about it he says he doesnt think about it anymore because he doesnt want to be disappointed. This was kind of a red flag for me. He says im being dumb, but what do you think? how do i ask him how he is feeling? I dont know if he would tell me if he wasnt in love with me anymore.Im falling apart. I need relationship advice asap!?
Quite plain and simply...


Talk to him.


Whether he loves you or not he should talk to you about it because if he still loves you then great! you guys can figure out why he seems so distant and if by chance he doesn't have such strong feelings anymore (here's hoping he does since you still do) he should be fair to you and let you know instead of dragging you along and hurting you because you don't deserve to sit there and wonder if the love is still there...





And if he does still love you then perhaps are you looking for more cuddling and affection (more love) then before? I myself and many of my friends have been through the feeling of not being as loved just to find that it was just our own selves looking for more love when nothing in the relationship has changed.








I hope i at least helped a little.....


good luck hun and much loveIm falling apart. I need relationship advice asap!?
You're definitely right for seeing a red flag. You've been a relationship too long for your boyfriend to say that to you. At this point in your life you don't want to waste anymore time with someone that does not see a future with you when you've been together for almost 3 years.





I'm sorry to say this- but I think you should break up with him if he can't tell you there's a future. Once you can't see a future with someone, there's no reason to stay with them. It sounds like he's just too comfortable to rock the boat. You might need to be the one who needs to jump ship.
I have dated someone before who has went distant on me as well. I has the same feeling you had and we didn't last very long. Maybe he is just busy with work or something. Try having a serious talk with him and tell him how you really feel about your relationship and about him being all distant towards you. If he keeps saying acting the same way then move on and leave him alone. You deserve someone who will give you the world, everyone does.
tate you sound retarded whats love gotta do with it its just an emotion naw jk but um for real he grew up i guess i meen how old are you?cuz if your were like 19-21 when yall talked like that its normal if younger your retarted. but like for real people break up and this relationshipisn'tt for certain i meen alot of people thought that ima spend the rest of my life with this person and itdoesn'tt work out but then agin im only 14 =) so my advice is to just let it flow don'tt trip bout that not talking bout future stuff anymore
Saying I love you isn't going to prove how he feels. He doesn't need to verbally tell you he's not in love with you any more.....His actions are telling you, or will tell you how he feels. You might need to consider that perhaps the last 3 years has been better for you than it has for him.


Red Flags don't just pop up for no reason. Listen to your inner voice when it niggles away at you. If you're feeling like something is wrong, something probably is wrong!
if you weren't having sex(';great sex life'; as you said), then i would question his intentions. you are putting this all on him. what if ';he'; feels that there is too much talk after 4yrs. and not enough action as far as your future together is concerned. if you really want to be sure then ';flip it'; on him and propose.
Have you guys ';done it'; yet?


I'm not being pervy but really, that could be the key to this.





Either you have and he's regretting it... or wanting more?


Or you haven't and he's feeling like he's never gonna get any.
He doesn't see this going to long term, that's why he told you he didn't want to get his hopes up. He is doubtful.
I'm sorry, ask him just straight out ask do you love me?
What he said is very clear....he cannot see a future with you at this present moment! It might change it might not....but as long as u guys are still having a good time...enjoy yourself.
ask him where your relationship is going.





and ask if he still loves u
Ah this sounds familiar.


I have a bf for 1.5 years and then he started pulling that crap-said he wasnt sure if he wanted a gf anymore- so I dumped him. We ended up dating for the last yr and now we are over (my doing) but the pt is...


thats never good.





I remember that- makes your stomache drop-1 second its all promise rings and your future together and then its the Im not sure- I dont think about it anymore. I would agree this is a red flag..


if you dont want to dump him...I will give you this advice from my 2.5 yr exp with the last guy I dated.





Your guy is acting distant- dont try and fix it.


Go spend more time with your friends- regain your life-spend more time being independent..nothing is sexier than independence.


I know this sounds weird but from my experience when people feel their significant other drifting away they try to pull them back but in trying to get their gf/bf back...they push them away.





I think I initially pushed mine away by trying to make sure we didnt fall apart- putting in that extra effort is worthless because the last yr we dated (when we werent official) ...i decided why should I try? my efforts went unappreciated...the more I didnt try...the more he did try...dont ask me why or how that works Idk all I know is that guys seem to be more interested if you seem disinterested. So hang out with him less- see your friends more- regain your life





And if he doesnt come back- fall back in love with you (mine ended up doing so)- than when **** hits the fan...youll have a life.