And over the summer they had a friends with benefits relationship. Only he had deeper feelings for her, which she didn't feel for him. She ended up getting a boyfriend and really hurting him. He, however, lied to me about that whole story and I heard it from a very trusted mutual friend of ours. Ever since then I have noticed that they seem way too close. For example, they hang out a few times a week and meet up with each other after school everyday before they leave. And sometimes he drives her home. He doesn't do nearly that much for me. We usually hang out once or twice a week(however he has admitted that he has ditched her to be with me). And I get along great with his friends, but he only invites me when she isn't there. Whenever I see her she gives me nasty looks or just pretends I don't exist. Most of the time they spend together is in groups and they don't go on dates or anything like we do. But when they are together she will try to distract him so he doesn't see me. She is a super flirty person, so I don't know if that's just how she is. And she has a reputation for being nasty to other girls for no reason whatsoever.
They are best friends, and we are still pretty new, so I don't really have much say in this. I would never want to make him choose between us. But she is sooo controlling and manipulative to the point that I feel like I don't stand a chance against her. But him and I have something very special, and I am going to do whatever it takes to keep it. But I just can't see how it could work with her in the picture. What do I do? If I should talk to him, how should I do it without coming off as jealous and needy?Kind of long, but I just need some quality relationship advice, please?
I don't think this is a situation that you want to be in. Obviously these two have something going on that you don't know about. If there wasn't something going on then he wouldn't have lied to you about the situation to begin with. He may want to be with you as much as you want to be with him, but unfortunately he doesn't seem like he wants to cut the purse strings. When he's good and ready to he needs to do it for himself, not for you, so I wouldn't push him to do anything he doesn't want to do. But she would also not get away with disrespecting me to my face. I'm not saying slap her, but clearly put down that if you speak to her, she needs to speak to you. Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself because it seems to me like he's not going to do it for you, nor should he really have to. Kind of long, but I just need some quality relationship advice, please?
FIND A NEW MAN! For it appears that he is cheating on you. It appears that way. Or, do the same thing to him that he does to you. (With another man) Give him a taste of his own medicine.
My advice would be not to ask for QUALITY relationship advice on yahoo. Talk to a friend or family member.
just be yourself
Honey, that just sounds so wrong. If he truly loves you and he is your boyfriend he should always side with you and you should be his love that takes priority over all others including some manipulating selfish girl that just likes him toddling along for whenever she needs him. He needs to grow up and start realizing that, unfortunately that sometimes takes a lot of time and hurt from the other - you. You can either stick with him and wait till he realizes it, even try and talk to him, though I fear he will choose her at this point or try and find someone who appreciates you for what you are, a wonderful and caring person, who loves you and cherishes you and doesn't value some vindictive girl's opinion over that of the one he supposedly loves. It's up to you and your patience and willingness to be hurt over and over again many times. I wish you the best and feel for you.
You are smart to realize this ';best friend'; of your new boyfriend is a serious rival. Sounds like she is just keeping him handy and using him when she needs him, be it for sex or friendship. Your only hope is for your new boyfriend to grow up enough to think about how he is being manipulated by her and break off the relationship. If he does this then expect her to come after to you with claws and fangs bared.
Is he worth all the complications, trouble and pain? You are the only one who can decide.
Well, I can understand where you are coming from because I have been through that before. I say follow your heart and if it tells you to talk to him, do it. He needs to concentrate more on his relationship other than his best friend. I don't care if that is his best friend, he should spend more time with you instead of a sleezy broad. You should also ask him why does he have a sleezy bestfriend because thats' making him look bad as well.. Just have a talk with him and don't sound needy or jealous. Just be yourself and tell him how you feel about their friendship. If he doesn't take your opinions into consideration, he doesn't deserve you.
Really sit down and evaluate your relationship with your boyfriend. It sounds to me like he got a girlfriend because he felt he had something to prove to this girl.
She sounds like a witch too.
If you really want to be with him, then sit him down and tell what is on your mind. If you don't then you will never know what is going on in his mind.
If he listens to everything she says than he may still have feelings for her. If you really like him than stand up for yourself be strong and don't let that loser intimidate you. She must be intimidated by you which is why she tries to steal your BF's attention away from you. If the girl really wants to she may try to trick him to getting back with her just so she will feel good about herself and - it may work. Don't fall for this guy just yet because it seems like he doesn't have a back bone. If this girl is ever rude to you in front of your bf or says something really nasty and your boyfriend doesn't defend you - you have the option of either slapping her really hard to shut her up or you can be classy about it and answer her with a strong voice but don't ever get intimidated by her because that's what she wants. Bottom line try not to fall for him quite yet, observe him, if she's rude to you - defend yourself and if he still doesn't change dump him and get someone else that is worth it.
You must be honest with him. If he feels that your being jealous and needy, maybe it's time to let him go. You don't need that kind of stress in your life. It sounds like he's seeing her and dating you. Not a good picture. Talk to him, and maybe even talk to her about it. She needs to leave the two of you alone.
i can understand how frustrating you situation is. I think you should talk to him. Say this, '; I like you very much and i trust that you like me too. Im not attacking you or your friendships and i hope you will be understanding of what i have to say. I feel a bit jealous of your ';friendship with X. you guys have a intimate history, (explain some of her traits), sometimes I feel uncomfortable when she is there, and sometimes I see you do things for her that you dont do for me. Im not asking you to eliminate her from your life, but a slight detox. It just feels like she controls your life sometimes. I dont want anyone controlling you. Not even me. I know people come with history and baggage. I have exes too, but i would never let them interfere with us. So please could you stop letting her control you, or flirt with you etc.';
Be mature, rationale, polite and gentle. Admit that you are jealous and uncomfortable, thats not a bad thing. good luck
Well my best advice is think realistically what is going to happen...This will help you answer that VERy question please do take your time and answer seriously, ther eis no point fooling yourself
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Sorry gave the wrong link here it is:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;鈥?/a>
Stop kidding yourself. He still wants her, and she enjoys him chasing her. They aren't best friends, she's just playing a ';you want me but can't have me'; game and he's falling for it. If I were you, I'd just move on. There's nothing you can say or do to make it stop without making yourself look desperate or insecure. Get out while it's still new before you're miserable.
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