Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Doubts in my head... RE: my (military boyf) relationship...Advice pls...?

I really feel strange right now.. Ive been with my boyfriend for nearly a year... Ive felt totally crazy about him, but this last weekend somethings felt weird in my head and Its bothering me..





Hes american, in the forces and will in 18 months be re-deployed somewhere else... We've talked about it and most probably, I will go with him.. Which always seemed so exciting.. But I spent a while talking to the girlfriend of his buddy on saturday and she told me how lonely she feels here.. (shes american.. in england.. but cant get a job at the moment) how she misses her family.. And it really got to me.. The reality of my relationship..





Has anyone got any advice, anyone been in that situation of leaving everyone you know...? How did you cope?Doubts in my head... RE: my (military boyf) relationship...Advice pls...?
It truly takes a certain type of person to be in a relationship with military personnel. Other military wives/girlfriends are your best bet at making it work because there will be times you feel lonely but don't let it get you down. Where ever he goes next there will be other military wives/girlfriends. You can get to know them, they will be your friends and give you the support you will need. The military group is a close nit family. It won't be easy in the beginning you will miss your friends and family but it will get managable. Find a job, volunteer, find things to occupy your time and keep your mind busy while he is out in the feild or something.Doubts in my head... RE: my (military boyf) relationship...Advice pls...?
How old are you? ... Young enough to start again?





They say love can conquer anything, but it isn't true. Sometimes it is easier to know when to call it quits and start again. The fact is that there is more than one guy out there who ticks all of your boxes, so think long and hard before you make such a huge life change for someone who, in the grand scheme of things, you haven't been with that long.





At the end of the day, you know deep down what the right thing to do for you is. If you have doubts, then its normally for a good reason, but sometimes its not easy to make the big decision for fear of the short term emotional grief that comes with it.





Good luck.
my ex boyfriend was in the army when i was dating him. we dated for 2 years off and on and in the end i got fed up of being in that kind of relationship, knowing he was off with other women everytime he left the barracks, it just wasnt right, i wanted more. So i left him! I was gonna marry him, and live on the base with him, but i didnt love him and i couldnt be isolated like that in a place where i knew nobody but him


That was 4 years ago, im very very happy now :) got a partner and a child, i started again, and so could you! :)
Nobody knows what the next minute holds, let alone the medium or long term.





';Crazy about him'; is not enough, for a start. Can you visualise being with him for life, because if not, particularly in the special circumstances of his case, it would be a very drastic step.





Moving to another country can be rejuvenating [I am an ex-pat], however in the case of a military background, you might end up in unfamiliar circumstances [and nowhere is this the best time to look for a job], while he is re-deployed elsewhere, where you cannot follow him.





Draw a decision tree showing all the what-if's. Then look at it objectively.





Good luck
This is similar to a question raised not so long ago but yet so very different. I know that may sound strange but what I mean is you'll be moving with your boyfriend but still won't see much of him anyway. There is the difference.





Besides that, how confident are you that you will settle wherever it is you'll move to - will you try and find work? What will you feel when he is re-deployed again and you're settled and then having to up-root everything....such as your life?





I don't want to reveal too much but I'm kind of facing the same sort of thing - however I'm staying put, I am trying to have my own life to - the gap that will be left will be huge, but the world has grown smaller and its easier to keep in touch....even see each other via webcam - okay, I admit it isn't as romantic as being together but sometimes sacrifices and compromises really do have to be made.





.......planes are available that will take me wherever I want to be (cheaply too!).





Whatever it is you decide I do wish you the best of luck, but would advise you to live your life for you and not for your family. It's hard, I know, but you could always live with regrets......not nice when there are opportunities and opening doors.
i have an answer for yur question





i had a friend of mine who had this same situation like u had.





he is an airforce pilot and his girlfriend is a home science student.





it all started as u have stated yurself everything above, and the outcome was simple .


how!





see , he didnt get married .





read this carefully





as he was deployed to canada for traning, his girlfriend decided to go along with him becoz she felt this would be enjoyable. it was enjoyable , but hardly a month, she got bored and decided to end this relationship seeing that nothing was keeping her and her boyfriend together . But this


boyfriedn found a solution . Since she was studying her home science course which she left for him he gave her an oppertunity for her to finish her graduation completly in canada. luckly she got admitted to a reniwed college and by the time she completed her full graduation his traning was also got completed . so they came back home and now they living together, working in different fields and u wont belive it


they r going to get married! funny right





well wat i wanna tell u is





dont drop yur relationship for some purpose but acquire something else , something that would make u also get engaged with and there wont be any touble at all . that my advise





hope u like it





thnk u!
i myself am in a relationship with a military man and yes you do get lonely, but its just one of those things that comes with being the a military man...but if you are going to be away from your family, you can always pick up the phone and call them...keep in touch by sending pictures and emailing and such...
I have met several soliders on millionaire dating site %26lt;WealthyRomance.com%26gt;. Now they are in Iraq, they miss their girl friends and fmaily very much! Sometimes long distance is a real problem to love!
i was in the same situation, it drove me made and in the end it drove a wedge between us and we aren't together now (it was around christmas)
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