Okay, so here's my dilemma:
I have a boyfriend of almost 6 months, and I love him a lot and he loves me... we've been through a lot, you know.
But then, the other day, I went to hang out with one of my best friends, and some of her friends I had never met. Well, with these guys there just happened to be this guy I REALLY took a liking to. After a few days of hanging with them, he told me he liked me a lot, and it was too bad I had a boyfriend.
So after I leave, of course I am really confused because I can't get this guy out of my head (which was weird, because he's the first guy I had even crushed on since I started going out with my current bf). After all this I get a phone call from my bf saying all this sh!t about how I'm changing and I abandoned him for my other friends for a week (it was actually two days) and all this nonsense. So now I'm DOUBLY confused... I decided that since this was not the first time he had done this, I was going to break up with him the first chance I saw him in person; but what does he do the next day? Comes to my house with flowers in tears.
I have no idea what to do now! I've got one guy stuck in my head, and my boyfriend is calling me crying about how wrong he was... Should I suggest we take a ';break'; to cool of from this?I DEFINITELY need some relationship advice!?
leave your first bf. sorry he needs to man up.I DEFINITELY need some relationship advice!?
sort your thoughts for both boys
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Can anyone help me...relationship advice?
My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years in May. 3 months into the relationship we both agreed that this will be a permanent and made plans for our future together (no formal engagement, just spoken in words). Well about a 1-and-a-half years into it I made a terrible mistake. I cheated on him...I regret it to this day. I was selfish to want him and this other guy. After a week of separation, we were back together. And we have been together since.
The years to follow weren't easy. In fact it seemed as if got worse by the day, but I knew nothing would happen to either of us again, the way I made a bad choice. Well it I was wrong. He fell in love with another girl who he was seeing ';on the side'; at work. These feelings weren't infatuation. He said he just needed someone to talk to about us. I remember he told me about her in an instant message conversation. Of all things! He asked her if they would ever have a chance together. She said she didn't know. From what it sounded she was everything I wasn't and more. Well that night when we talked he said he wasn't sure if he wanted to break with me because he didn't want to chance loosing to a new relationship with her. I was devestated to hear this. But we never did end the relationship that night. The next morning we got into an arguement. And so once again he said he still wanted to be with her. Once again I told him he has to choose, and if he chooses me he has to break all contact with her. He reluctantly agreed. About 2 months later we had another one of our arguements. He then told me that if we broke up he always wanted to make things workout between him and her. Well we broke up. This time I left. I walked out in tears. But he came after me. Saying he was sorry. I went to a hill we used to sit on when we fell in love those first wonderful months of our relationship. He convinced me to stay. 4 months have passed, and he hasn't given anything that would make me think he still wants to be with her. Recently I found out more bad news. His friends are trying to convince him to break up with me and get back together with her. I feel like he's violated my trust not just once but several times. I told him I didn't like it and I didn't want him to hang out with them. He tells me I have to get over what happened and that he doesn't listen to his friends.
I guess my question is this: Am I wrong to try to tell him I dont want him to hang out with these people? The same ones that were rooting him on when he started seeing this other girl?Can anyone help me...relationship advice?
I understand how you feel about the situation but would you want him telling you who you can hang out with and not. I wouldn't want that. The main thing you should have a in a relationship is trust. If you cant trust him then you might as well not be together.You have to believe that he tells the truth and doesn't do things behind your back. He has to do the same with you also. Guy friends may try to root him on to the other girl but if he truly loves you and wants to be with you, he will stay with you and not listen to them.. Good Luck %26lt;333Can anyone help me...relationship advice?
Boy your really letting him have his cake and eat it too.
When will you ever get to have someone just for you ? why do YOU hang on?
Let him go It will always be the same with him.
Live your life , life is to short to be worrying about unhappy thoughts.
Lost my patience.Be brief.No likes to read history book while surfing.
Wrong section.
+ it's too long, no one here will read it.
hell no you are not wrong girl. You have every right to feel that way. But some advice to you, if he wants to be with someone else, let him. Dont run after any guy because he is not worth a broken heart. Why would you want to be with someone who wants to be with someone else? There are so many fish in the sea and i know five years is a long time. But the longer you stay, the more time you are wasting finding the guy that wants you and only you.....
Friends are for life a girlfriend is not ...I wouldn't tell anyone who they can and can't talk to ...but if he thinks his friends opinions are more important then you then its time to say bye bye to this relationship..once trust is broken then its hard to recover ...
I forgive my wife for cheating but things where never the same , we muddled on for a year or so for the sake of the children but we knew it wasn't going to work cause the trust was gone ..Thankfully we are both happy since the divorce
The years to follow weren't easy. In fact it seemed as if got worse by the day, but I knew nothing would happen to either of us again, the way I made a bad choice. Well it I was wrong. He fell in love with another girl who he was seeing ';on the side'; at work. These feelings weren't infatuation. He said he just needed someone to talk to about us. I remember he told me about her in an instant message conversation. Of all things! He asked her if they would ever have a chance together. She said she didn't know. From what it sounded she was everything I wasn't and more. Well that night when we talked he said he wasn't sure if he wanted to break with me because he didn't want to chance loosing to a new relationship with her. I was devestated to hear this. But we never did end the relationship that night. The next morning we got into an arguement. And so once again he said he still wanted to be with her. Once again I told him he has to choose, and if he chooses me he has to break all contact with her. He reluctantly agreed. About 2 months later we had another one of our arguements. He then told me that if we broke up he always wanted to make things workout between him and her. Well we broke up. This time I left. I walked out in tears. But he came after me. Saying he was sorry. I went to a hill we used to sit on when we fell in love those first wonderful months of our relationship. He convinced me to stay. 4 months have passed, and he hasn't given anything that would make me think he still wants to be with her. Recently I found out more bad news. His friends are trying to convince him to break up with me and get back together with her. I feel like he's violated my trust not just once but several times. I told him I didn't like it and I didn't want him to hang out with them. He tells me I have to get over what happened and that he doesn't listen to his friends.
I guess my question is this: Am I wrong to try to tell him I dont want him to hang out with these people? The same ones that were rooting him on when he started seeing this other girl?Can anyone help me...relationship advice?
I understand how you feel about the situation but would you want him telling you who you can hang out with and not. I wouldn't want that. The main thing you should have a in a relationship is trust. If you cant trust him then you might as well not be together.You have to believe that he tells the truth and doesn't do things behind your back. He has to do the same with you also. Guy friends may try to root him on to the other girl but if he truly loves you and wants to be with you, he will stay with you and not listen to them.. Good Luck %26lt;333Can anyone help me...relationship advice?
Boy your really letting him have his cake and eat it too.
When will you ever get to have someone just for you ? why do YOU hang on?
Let him go It will always be the same with him.
Live your life , life is to short to be worrying about unhappy thoughts.
Lost my patience.Be brief.No likes to read history book while surfing.
Wrong section.
+ it's too long, no one here will read it.
hell no you are not wrong girl. You have every right to feel that way. But some advice to you, if he wants to be with someone else, let him. Dont run after any guy because he is not worth a broken heart. Why would you want to be with someone who wants to be with someone else? There are so many fish in the sea and i know five years is a long time. But the longer you stay, the more time you are wasting finding the guy that wants you and only you.....
Friends are for life a girlfriend is not ...I wouldn't tell anyone who they can and can't talk to ...but if he thinks his friends opinions are more important then you then its time to say bye bye to this relationship..once trust is broken then its hard to recover ...
I forgive my wife for cheating but things where never the same , we muddled on for a year or so for the sake of the children but we knew it wasn't going to work cause the trust was gone ..Thankfully we are both happy since the divorce
Just would like some relationship advice?
i was with this girl for like a yr and a half and she decided to take a break but after a month of the break there was so much tension and anger about the break between her and me that i had ended it completely... right now im dating another girl but i had fell in love with my ex and still love her and i don't know what to do to cope with losing the person i loved and accepting my new gf more and other girls... im just wondering how did other ppl cope with losing the person they had fell in love with while having another partnerJust would like some relationship advice?
maybe there was so much tension and anger because you guys never actually took a ';break';.. and maybe she is still in love with you?? did you ever think of that.. and did you ever stop to think the girl ur dating was a girl u claimed hurt you and u hated..because she cheated on you..and claimed she was preggees?? maybe she's confused too.. it just dont make sense.. msybe she is still in love with you..but uve hurt her. well wish you the best..
maybe there was so much tension and anger because you guys never actually took a ';break';.. and maybe she is still in love with you?? did you ever think of that.. and did you ever stop to think the girl ur dating was a girl u claimed hurt you and u hated..because she cheated on you..and claimed she was preggees?? maybe she's confused too.. it just dont make sense.. msybe she is still in love with you..but uve hurt her. well wish you the best..
Help needed for sister relationship advice.?
Sister thinks I am been selfish but cant be further from truth. We used to be very close, now she comes to me when needing help eg. money problems, but when she doesn't need help she wants nothing to do with me eg. doesn't answer phone and not coming to see me. I pointed this out to her that I feel like I am been used and then she flips saying I need to grow up and get over it, so I then said fine don't come to me for help when you need it next time and she is saying now I am been childish and selfish. I think she is depressed and don't want to get into a situation where she doesn't talk to me at all so should I just drop it and be nice to her ignoring what she does? Help needed for sister relationship advice.?
You have to stop enabling your sister to depend on you when she mishandles her money. Now, if there was an emergency and she didn't have enough money and asked for help, I could understand that. BUT, if she just doesn't have her priorities straight when it comes to managing her money, I'd quit giving her money, even if that meant the relationship is over.
Your sister knows she can depend on you to bail her out when she needs money. You have to put a stop to that. You are enabling her to continue doing what she's doing. She will never learn to manage things herself if you keep bailing her out financially.
If she gets upset when you bring the subject up, that goes to show you it is true. Otherwise, she wouldn't get so defensive and resort to name-calling.
I know it may be hard since she is your sister, but you have to do what you have to do. Good luck.Help needed for sister relationship advice.?
You cant just leave it alone. I am in the same situation, I am supporting myself and my sister keeps holding me back. Maybe its time you o not go directly to her. Find the underlying problem, talk to some of her friends professes, teachers whatever you can do to find out whats going on without making her upset and flipping out on you. Maybe there is a big problem and if you don't help her get over her depression now there are going to be problems in the near future.
Write her a long letter and mail it to her certified. This is all you can do.
just talk to here
One of you will have to wear the big girl panties and you seem to be the best candidate. You can do this without being used by her. People now days seem to think that they can make bad choices with their funds and yours as well. You should hold to your stance of not paying to be her sister because you already are and nothing on your part will ever change that. She will know how she got in the ';po house'; and will probably ask you what are you doing there should you continue to be her ';I spent all of mine'; backup. Continue to love her no matter if she doesn't call, answer when you do, or come if she doesn't want something. My philosophy is if you only tolerate me when I do what you want, you want me for a fool and not a friend so regardless to what I do I don't have a friend. She calls you selfish and childish because she won't face it as an accurate description of herself. If she really felt that, why would she expect you to give her money? Children don't have it and the selfish never part with it.
Be Blessed
You have to stop enabling your sister to depend on you when she mishandles her money. Now, if there was an emergency and she didn't have enough money and asked for help, I could understand that. BUT, if she just doesn't have her priorities straight when it comes to managing her money, I'd quit giving her money, even if that meant the relationship is over.
Your sister knows she can depend on you to bail her out when she needs money. You have to put a stop to that. You are enabling her to continue doing what she's doing. She will never learn to manage things herself if you keep bailing her out financially.
If she gets upset when you bring the subject up, that goes to show you it is true. Otherwise, she wouldn't get so defensive and resort to name-calling.
I know it may be hard since she is your sister, but you have to do what you have to do. Good luck.Help needed for sister relationship advice.?
You cant just leave it alone. I am in the same situation, I am supporting myself and my sister keeps holding me back. Maybe its time you o not go directly to her. Find the underlying problem, talk to some of her friends professes, teachers whatever you can do to find out whats going on without making her upset and flipping out on you. Maybe there is a big problem and if you don't help her get over her depression now there are going to be problems in the near future.
Write her a long letter and mail it to her certified. This is all you can do.
just talk to here
One of you will have to wear the big girl panties and you seem to be the best candidate. You can do this without being used by her. People now days seem to think that they can make bad choices with their funds and yours as well. You should hold to your stance of not paying to be her sister because you already are and nothing on your part will ever change that. She will know how she got in the ';po house'; and will probably ask you what are you doing there should you continue to be her ';I spent all of mine'; backup. Continue to love her no matter if she doesn't call, answer when you do, or come if she doesn't want something. My philosophy is if you only tolerate me when I do what you want, you want me for a fool and not a friend so regardless to what I do I don't have a friend. She calls you selfish and childish because she won't face it as an accurate description of herself. If she really felt that, why would she expect you to give her money? Children don't have it and the selfish never part with it.
Be Blessed
Help? I need serious relationship advice!!!?
Also, he never talks it out and when he does I'm always wrong...he just tells me I'm insecure. : ( It's true I used to have problems because I was mistreated in other relationship and had trust issues...but I try everyday to get over that and I'd say I've come a LONG way. Heck, I allow him to nude photography at a clients HOUSE and drink wine afterwards? Sometimes he doesn't come home until 10pm.Help? I need serious relationship advice!!!?
What a fake question. Let's see...he shows off him getting head from his exs (which btw has probably happened while you two are together), nude photography at 10 pm, you can't even view it.
So the question is what to do when your boyfriend is cheating on you AND is physically abusive? Makes you feel excluded and guilty for his cheating? Sounds like a catch--I can see why you are eager to marry him.
Just dump him and move on.Help? I need serious relationship advice!!!?
Don't try to change him. Don't make ultimatums. Don't pout. Don't cry.
He needs to just be himself.
And now that you know this about him, is this what you want to sign up for?
Is this a deal breaker?
Personally, I think you should kick him to the curb or drop kick him through the uprights ( your choice ).
You can do better than him!
*
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GET RID OF THIS JERK!
let him go!makeup class
What a fake question. Let's see...he shows off him getting head from his exs (which btw has probably happened while you two are together), nude photography at 10 pm, you can't even view it.
So the question is what to do when your boyfriend is cheating on you AND is physically abusive? Makes you feel excluded and guilty for his cheating? Sounds like a catch--I can see why you are eager to marry him.
Just dump him and move on.Help? I need serious relationship advice!!!?
Don't try to change him. Don't make ultimatums. Don't pout. Don't cry.
He needs to just be himself.
And now that you know this about him, is this what you want to sign up for?
Is this a deal breaker?
Personally, I think you should kick him to the curb or drop kick him through the uprights ( your choice ).
You can do better than him!
*
*
*
GET RID OF THIS JERK!
let him go!
I need long distance relationship advice?
my fiance lives 11 hours away and we've been together for almost 2 years now.. Sometimes the relationship isn't as lively as it used to be but its hard, this whole never seeing each other thing.. i was just wondering what kind of advice i could get to spice up our telephone texting love life thing we got going lol Its really all we have to enjoy of each other but one or two weekends out of the month. he just got back from iraq in late march and im running out of material over here. help a lady out?? =PI need long distance relationship advice?
ask him what he could do with chocolate syrup and strawberries? or whipped cream and nuts lol
ask him what he could do with chocolate syrup and strawberries? or whipped cream and nuts lol
I really need advice (relationship)?
Okay, so my ex broke up with me said it was because he was going through a rough patch in his life and just wanted to be single. His roomate told me it was actually because I was to clingy (because hes 16 and I didnt want him to go out getting stoned and drunk I wanted him to stay over)
Was that to clingy of me ? or is he just a buthole for lying to me and choosing to go get stoned rather then be with me.
And how the heck do I stop liking him.I really need advice (relationship)?
Hi, it could be bit of both! The thing is he is in a situation where he is got the lure of going out partying with his mates, although at 16 it's not the best idea, you wanted to be the caring one and be like a boyfriend and girlfriend. He had a battle going on in his mind. On this occasion the party won over the caring and loving girlfriend.
So what to do? To stop liking him so much is a hard one, it wil take time, but to help keep this thought in mind, at the moment you feel rejected, hurt, angry and unloved, to name a few emotions, you have to regain those some how. You have to think that if was mature enough to have a long term relationship with you, then it would have been so. Your friends will be key to helping you get over him. Of course if you see him on a regular basis that might be a bit harder. But remember you are just as special, just as important as anybody else, go out and hold your head high, soon all will feel well again!
Good luck, hope this helps. Uk Personal Trainer and basic Life CoachI really need advice (relationship)?
It's hard to just stop liking someone it is a process none the less, and no you wern't clingy you are responsible and considerate. Just know he wasn't worth your efforts and remind yourself of that. Hold you head up, the more you don't notice him, the more he'll notice you. (Not always the case. but ignoring them does have an effect)
Was that to clingy of me ? or is he just a buthole for lying to me and choosing to go get stoned rather then be with me.
And how the heck do I stop liking him.I really need advice (relationship)?
Hi, it could be bit of both! The thing is he is in a situation where he is got the lure of going out partying with his mates, although at 16 it's not the best idea, you wanted to be the caring one and be like a boyfriend and girlfriend. He had a battle going on in his mind. On this occasion the party won over the caring and loving girlfriend.
So what to do? To stop liking him so much is a hard one, it wil take time, but to help keep this thought in mind, at the moment you feel rejected, hurt, angry and unloved, to name a few emotions, you have to regain those some how. You have to think that if was mature enough to have a long term relationship with you, then it would have been so. Your friends will be key to helping you get over him. Of course if you see him on a regular basis that might be a bit harder. But remember you are just as special, just as important as anybody else, go out and hold your head high, soon all will feel well again!
Good luck, hope this helps. Uk Personal Trainer and basic Life CoachI really need advice (relationship)?
It's hard to just stop liking someone it is a process none the less, and no you wern't clingy you are responsible and considerate. Just know he wasn't worth your efforts and remind yourself of that. Hold you head up, the more you don't notice him, the more he'll notice you. (Not always the case. but ignoring them does have an effect)
Ok I need advice....relationship troubles.....?
Im 17 years old and my boyfriend is 20 years old....ive known him since he was 12 and i was 9.....my parents however have forbidden me to speak to him.....but i do anyway.....everynight at 11 i call him and we talk until 4am....i love him more than anything in the world and he feels the same about me.....what should I do? should I try to make it work even though my parents hate him? or should i give up altogether?Ok I need advice....relationship troubles.....?
Sounds like the typical Romeo and Juliet story. You are 17, and if you are love this man and you and him talk about having a future together, make it known to your parents. They dont have to like him, but they really should accept him and your decision to be with him. Is he a bad boy or something? Does he get you to do bad things? You are almost 18, which means you will be considered independent and can always move out of their house. Just keep in mind that they are your parents and you should always respect them and love them no matter what happens with your boyfriend. DO NOT give up having a relationship w/your parents however for this boy if it comes to it. Trust me, you will realize that will be the biggest mistake of your life! Good luck!
-EAOk I need advice....relationship troubles.....?
Stick it out another year, until it is legal for you to have a relationship, because if you really love him you wont put him in the situation where he is breaking the law. And if it really works between you two your parents will come around when you get married and have kids 10+ years in the future. but DO NOT make the mistake of having one now, he will go to jail, and if your parents dont like him, all the better to wait. GROW UP FIRST then have a real relationship.
if you trully love him make it work you only got 1 more yr till your 18 then they can't say or do ne thing and you can move out.
If this is ment to be then you will still be in contact with him when your old enough to make your own decesions. Be aware your parents say these things for a reason, maybe they see something you dont. If you can, you should talk to them about their concerns.
first, id address why your parents have forbidden you to talk to him. whats the reason?
and go from there.
If it's true love than he can wait till your eighteen and out of the house
That one is kinda tuff. On one hand I am a father, and the father in me wants to tell you that your daddy knows best. And the non father in me says maybe.
Give it up and wait until you're older - things will change
BTW, why did your parents forbid you to see/talk to him?
your parents hate him, not you if you really love him stay with
A little more info would help.
Why do your parents hate him?
Are they maybe trying to protect you from someone they think is going to harm you?
At 17 you have a lot of life yet to live, don't believe this is the end of the world if you lose him.
don't give up!! it's YOUR life!
try and make it work...you're almost 18, so hopefully youre parents will ease up...most parents do when their kid is going to leave home go to college, etc.
That's for you to decide. You're nearly a legal adult, however you didn't bother to mention WHY your parents seem to dislike this boy. Perhaps if we understood their reasons, we might be able to give you better advice.
You have one more year until you are 18. I would wait, and if love was meant to be, it will still be there waiting. It seems silly now, but most parents are correct in why they don't approve of the relationship. It isn't much of one, if you can't date either. Just be patient...it will work out one way or another.
Let me just say this. I have a 17 year old daughter myself, who has been sneaking around and lying to me about boys since she was 14. Now, there is not an ounce of trust between us and she is constantly making rebellious decisions that are messing up her life. she's on the verge of loosing her license for the 2nd time. she's on her 3rd job. do you see a pattern here?
the point is this. sneaking around is only making the situation worse.
Once you turn 18, the world is yours, and your decisions are yours to make with no one to answer to.
So, why can't you tone it down and let your friends help you 2 stay in communication with each other, without doing it under your parent's noses. That is so disrespectful..
Find a way to talk to each other without doing it at home in that way. and tone it down until you turn 18.
First of all, you are not a legal adult, therefore he is committing a crime by being with you! If you are not careful, you may be getting to talk to him from jail - won't that be fun?
You may not realize it right now, but your parents know best! I am willing to bet that there is more to this story and there is a VERY good reason why your parents forbid you to be with him!! If I am wrong, than you need to talk to your parents! If this guy is so wonderful, and he treats you so well, your parents should be able to understand that. If they refuse, than you either need to respect their wishes until you turn 18 and are able to move out, or continue going behind their backs and risk getting caught! Remember: Blood is thicker than water! If this man really loves you, he would NEVER expect you to disrespect your parents and risk losing their trust!
You already know what the right thing to do is! The question is.....are you strong enough to do it?????
If you truly love him you will make it work no matter what...and your parents will eventually have to deal with him...Ask yourself why do they hate him so much? Is it a bad reason like drugs or something because then it might not be worth it. If it a bogus reason like hes too old or a different race then go for it!
Listen to your parents family and friends step back and see what they are trying to tell you about him. Remember your parents may have been through a similar relationship when they were your age. They may also have your well being in hand.
They might want you to go to college and get a better education before you get to serious with someone. You are to young for a relationship. Always remember School first love later so that there is no regrets. Once you are involved all you want to do is be with that person. He may not want you to go to college once you get out of high school, because he is afraid you will meet someone else.
From my experience my parents told me that there was something about my boyfriend they did not like but I did not listen. I married him he has cheated on me repeatedly. My friends even said things I never took the time to listen and watch what they were saying. I always thought I could change his bad habits.
Just listen to what people have to say and step back and watch...
Why do your parents dislike him?If you know ,is it legit reasons.Think on why then go where your heart leads you. When your of age and your in love he will come first and your parents will have to learn you are grown and accept it.
in my country, we dont care much about what the parents think we just go for it but still we respect our parents. I'm surprised you guys are so obedient and listen to your parents, btw i'm from malaysia and i'm chinese.
for my case, i loved this girl and my mother dont like her and i didnt care about what my mother thinks, my mother think she is sl*t if you guys are wondering. then one year later my girlfriend fell inlove with my friends and dumped me, so i guess my mother was right back there haha.
Why do your parents hate him?
If it's something vague like, ';they don't like his family'; or ';my mom doesn't like his mom'; ... then you can probably win them over. Ask them if they would be willing to meet him and get to know him personally ... small doses. They may never like him but they may grow to trust him.
If it's something concrete like, ';he does drugs'; or ';he's been in prison'; ... you might want to consider that they have a valid point.
I'd say it all depends on what the core reason is that they don't want you speaking with him.
I say you should follow your heart if you are in love with him and he makes you happy then you should stay
Sounds like the typical Romeo and Juliet story. You are 17, and if you are love this man and you and him talk about having a future together, make it known to your parents. They dont have to like him, but they really should accept him and your decision to be with him. Is he a bad boy or something? Does he get you to do bad things? You are almost 18, which means you will be considered independent and can always move out of their house. Just keep in mind that they are your parents and you should always respect them and love them no matter what happens with your boyfriend. DO NOT give up having a relationship w/your parents however for this boy if it comes to it. Trust me, you will realize that will be the biggest mistake of your life! Good luck!
-EAOk I need advice....relationship troubles.....?
Stick it out another year, until it is legal for you to have a relationship, because if you really love him you wont put him in the situation where he is breaking the law. And if it really works between you two your parents will come around when you get married and have kids 10+ years in the future. but DO NOT make the mistake of having one now, he will go to jail, and if your parents dont like him, all the better to wait. GROW UP FIRST then have a real relationship.
if you trully love him make it work you only got 1 more yr till your 18 then they can't say or do ne thing and you can move out.
If this is ment to be then you will still be in contact with him when your old enough to make your own decesions. Be aware your parents say these things for a reason, maybe they see something you dont. If you can, you should talk to them about their concerns.
first, id address why your parents have forbidden you to talk to him. whats the reason?
and go from there.
If it's true love than he can wait till your eighteen and out of the house
That one is kinda tuff. On one hand I am a father, and the father in me wants to tell you that your daddy knows best. And the non father in me says maybe.
Give it up and wait until you're older - things will change
BTW, why did your parents forbid you to see/talk to him?
your parents hate him, not you if you really love him stay with
A little more info would help.
Why do your parents hate him?
Are they maybe trying to protect you from someone they think is going to harm you?
At 17 you have a lot of life yet to live, don't believe this is the end of the world if you lose him.
don't give up!! it's YOUR life!
try and make it work...you're almost 18, so hopefully youre parents will ease up...most parents do when their kid is going to leave home go to college, etc.
That's for you to decide. You're nearly a legal adult, however you didn't bother to mention WHY your parents seem to dislike this boy. Perhaps if we understood their reasons, we might be able to give you better advice.
You have one more year until you are 18. I would wait, and if love was meant to be, it will still be there waiting. It seems silly now, but most parents are correct in why they don't approve of the relationship. It isn't much of one, if you can't date either. Just be patient...it will work out one way or another.
Let me just say this. I have a 17 year old daughter myself, who has been sneaking around and lying to me about boys since she was 14. Now, there is not an ounce of trust between us and she is constantly making rebellious decisions that are messing up her life. she's on the verge of loosing her license for the 2nd time. she's on her 3rd job. do you see a pattern here?
the point is this. sneaking around is only making the situation worse.
Once you turn 18, the world is yours, and your decisions are yours to make with no one to answer to.
So, why can't you tone it down and let your friends help you 2 stay in communication with each other, without doing it under your parent's noses. That is so disrespectful..
Find a way to talk to each other without doing it at home in that way. and tone it down until you turn 18.
First of all, you are not a legal adult, therefore he is committing a crime by being with you! If you are not careful, you may be getting to talk to him from jail - won't that be fun?
You may not realize it right now, but your parents know best! I am willing to bet that there is more to this story and there is a VERY good reason why your parents forbid you to be with him!! If I am wrong, than you need to talk to your parents! If this guy is so wonderful, and he treats you so well, your parents should be able to understand that. If they refuse, than you either need to respect their wishes until you turn 18 and are able to move out, or continue going behind their backs and risk getting caught! Remember: Blood is thicker than water! If this man really loves you, he would NEVER expect you to disrespect your parents and risk losing their trust!
You already know what the right thing to do is! The question is.....are you strong enough to do it?????
If you truly love him you will make it work no matter what...and your parents will eventually have to deal with him...Ask yourself why do they hate him so much? Is it a bad reason like drugs or something because then it might not be worth it. If it a bogus reason like hes too old or a different race then go for it!
Listen to your parents family and friends step back and see what they are trying to tell you about him. Remember your parents may have been through a similar relationship when they were your age. They may also have your well being in hand.
They might want you to go to college and get a better education before you get to serious with someone. You are to young for a relationship. Always remember School first love later so that there is no regrets. Once you are involved all you want to do is be with that person. He may not want you to go to college once you get out of high school, because he is afraid you will meet someone else.
From my experience my parents told me that there was something about my boyfriend they did not like but I did not listen. I married him he has cheated on me repeatedly. My friends even said things I never took the time to listen and watch what they were saying. I always thought I could change his bad habits.
Just listen to what people have to say and step back and watch...
Why do your parents dislike him?If you know ,is it legit reasons.Think on why then go where your heart leads you. When your of age and your in love he will come first and your parents will have to learn you are grown and accept it.
in my country, we dont care much about what the parents think we just go for it but still we respect our parents. I'm surprised you guys are so obedient and listen to your parents, btw i'm from malaysia and i'm chinese.
for my case, i loved this girl and my mother dont like her and i didnt care about what my mother thinks, my mother think she is sl*t if you guys are wondering. then one year later my girlfriend fell inlove with my friends and dumped me, so i guess my mother was right back there haha.
Why do your parents hate him?
If it's something vague like, ';they don't like his family'; or ';my mom doesn't like his mom'; ... then you can probably win them over. Ask them if they would be willing to meet him and get to know him personally ... small doses. They may never like him but they may grow to trust him.
If it's something concrete like, ';he does drugs'; or ';he's been in prison'; ... you might want to consider that they have a valid point.
I'd say it all depends on what the core reason is that they don't want you speaking with him.
I say you should follow your heart if you are in love with him and he makes you happy then you should stay
If anyone need relationship or singles advice email me!?
If anyone needs personal advice just tell me comment or email on my profile or question tell me whats giong wrong and i will get good advice back to them because relationships are a hard thing for everyoneIf anyone need relationship or singles advice email me!?
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thanksIf anyone need relationship or singles advice email me!?
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?鈥?/a>
i dnt no if i really like thiz guy but i think i do but i dnt no at the same time..so how do i no if i really truly like him?
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thanksIf anyone need relationship or singles advice email me!?
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?鈥?/a>
i dnt no if i really like thiz guy but i think i do but i dnt no at the same time..so how do i no if i really truly like him?
I think my weight is causing an issue in my relationship,got any helpful dieting advice?
i think my boyfriend is losing interest and just keeping me around for financial support.I think my weight is causing an issue in my relationship,got any helpful dieting advice?
First, DROP the Boyfriend if he is just using you for your loot.
You are wonderful and amazing. he sucks if he just wants the green.
Second, tweak your diet and start working out a few times a week.
you'll lose weight, feel great, get your confidence back, and maybe even a new GREAT guy who isn't a user/abuser/sucker.
Work it, girl!I think my weight is causing an issue in my relationship,got any helpful dieting advice?
http://choosediet.blogspot.com/
First, DROP the Boyfriend if he is just using you for your loot.
You are wonderful and amazing. he sucks if he just wants the green.
Second, tweak your diet and start working out a few times a week.
you'll lose weight, feel great, get your confidence back, and maybe even a new GREAT guy who isn't a user/abuser/sucker.
Work it, girl!I think my weight is causing an issue in my relationship,got any helpful dieting advice?
http://choosediet.blogspot.com/
Any advice? My relationship is about to become long distance.?
Met a guy in May, we really hit it off - same sense of humor, attraction, get along great, etc. He now lives 20 minutes away. The thing is he's divorced and is taking his kids and going back to LA where he grew up and lived up until about 2000. I can fly out to see him, but have limited vacation time for this year. Since he has 3 small kids, he probably can't. He's bummed too cause he's saying he doesn't really want to go now, but he has no family out here.
He is keeping his house here cause his ex lives in the area and he'll bring his kids back and stay the whole summer and the kids 'll be with the ex the whole time (we hope). I'm not against moving to LA, but if he's going to spend 9 months in LA and 3 months back East every year, I need to work on a job that will let me do the same. My current job pays well but there's nowhere on the West Coast for me to work. (He does make a good living, so it may not be crucial right away).
Anyone been in the same position or any ideas?Any advice? My relationship is about to become long distance.?
I have some idea's . If moving in with him is an option you may go for it , it is nice out there. Also you may well find a suitable job there , they have most of the same as other states . You may try visiting on a vacation to get a better idea of what it is like there and get more of a feel of rather the relationship would work between you or not. If he has not asked or offered though I'd be kind of leery of the situation though and remain where you are. It's may be just as difficult for you to leave family and friends as he finds it difficult. If it were me bottom line though , I would stay put , eventually you'll find another you like as well or better.makeup class
He is keeping his house here cause his ex lives in the area and he'll bring his kids back and stay the whole summer and the kids 'll be with the ex the whole time (we hope). I'm not against moving to LA, but if he's going to spend 9 months in LA and 3 months back East every year, I need to work on a job that will let me do the same. My current job pays well but there's nowhere on the West Coast for me to work. (He does make a good living, so it may not be crucial right away).
Anyone been in the same position or any ideas?Any advice? My relationship is about to become long distance.?
I have some idea's . If moving in with him is an option you may go for it , it is nice out there. Also you may well find a suitable job there , they have most of the same as other states . You may try visiting on a vacation to get a better idea of what it is like there and get more of a feel of rather the relationship would work between you or not. If he has not asked or offered though I'd be kind of leery of the situation though and remain where you are. It's may be just as difficult for you to leave family and friends as he finds it difficult. If it were me bottom line though , I would stay put , eventually you'll find another you like as well or better.
What type of advice do you give to someone you love that is in a abusive relationship?
I can tell you what helped me the most. One of my friends told me to keep a bag packed with some essentials - I used a plastic grocery bag. Then if I needed to get out in a hurry I could grab it and go to her house. Another friend told me she didn't want to talk to me until after I was out of there. Once it got through my head how dangerous (abuse escalates) it was to stay there, I talked to my husband about getting help. When he refused, I made my plans to leave and carried them out. His reaction was - you put up with it this long why are you leaving now. Thats a pretty typical response I have since learned. My co-workers said I dropped ten years when I left. I think you get so used to the stress and tension you don't really see it and, by the time the physical abuse starts they have you convinced that 'if you just did/said something differently' so.........its all your fault. Please make sure they understand the danger and give them an escape route and a place to rest and be safe.What type of advice do you give to someone you love that is in a abusive relationship?
you just need to be there for that person i am female and had stayed in abusive relationship for 5 years and to this day i still don't understand why.I felt like i had no love ones and that was because people always said ';she must like it'; so i isolated even more. you might show this person that no matter what she or he does they don't need to put up with it and their is a lot of safe places to go and then do research in your city that take care of victims of dv. good luck it is a hard life to live and emotional abuse is just as bad. please show them love!What type of advice do you give to someone you love that is in a abusive relationship?
You can't just say, they must like it if you haven't been there. I was in an abusive relationship with my daughters father, but it didn't start out that way, it never does or you'd run a mile. They do it gradually then apologise and say it'll never happen again. And they blame a bad childhood, or work stress or they love you so much they just get so jealous... blah blah blah
Ok you have to remind her of what she used to be like before she met him. You have to remind her that a relationship should be a partnership where both people love and support each other. They are nice to each other and have fun together and want to make the other person feel good.
If he's hurting her he is sick and it will only get worse. Even if he says he'll change, it will only last for a few days or weeks and he'll go back to how he was. Cos thats who he is, he's a weak bully who picks on someone vulnerable to make him feel better. I know, I've been there. She needs to get away from him but she needs someone to help her. Try to get her to snap out of it, then tell her to pack whatever she can and take her somewhere he won't find her. You can always start again as long as you're still alive.
Simple to explain, hard to do!
'; The victim will get sick and tired of being sick and tired.';
Everytime that person goes back, they are then a ';volunteer victim.'; It takes more courage to walk away....Be a support, help them help themselves! Without confidence, they will just stay until they are beaten completely. Make sure you notify the proper channels for assistance. They are confidential and very assertive.
best wishes
Loh.
Just let them know that you are there for them, and that your are worried about them. Point out that life is too short not to be happy everyday. Never put someone a priority that treats you like an option. Their worth it!
Ask them why they like the abuse. They must like it, they sit there and take it.
physical abuse? you call the police for them. Emotional? tell them to dump that jackas$
Just try and build up their self esteem...tell them they are too great to put up with this abuse and they would be better off without the person. Help them come up with a plan so they can leave safely. Sometimes, for whatever reason, people just aren't ready to leave...but hopefully when they realize someone cares for them and things they are a worthy person, that will give them the help they need.
there is nothing you can say to that person -- her love and devotion to that person is more powerful than any friendship
you just need to be there for that person i am female and had stayed in abusive relationship for 5 years and to this day i still don't understand why.I felt like i had no love ones and that was because people always said ';she must like it'; so i isolated even more. you might show this person that no matter what she or he does they don't need to put up with it and their is a lot of safe places to go and then do research in your city that take care of victims of dv. good luck it is a hard life to live and emotional abuse is just as bad. please show them love!What type of advice do you give to someone you love that is in a abusive relationship?
You can't just say, they must like it if you haven't been there. I was in an abusive relationship with my daughters father, but it didn't start out that way, it never does or you'd run a mile. They do it gradually then apologise and say it'll never happen again. And they blame a bad childhood, or work stress or they love you so much they just get so jealous... blah blah blah
Ok you have to remind her of what she used to be like before she met him. You have to remind her that a relationship should be a partnership where both people love and support each other. They are nice to each other and have fun together and want to make the other person feel good.
If he's hurting her he is sick and it will only get worse. Even if he says he'll change, it will only last for a few days or weeks and he'll go back to how he was. Cos thats who he is, he's a weak bully who picks on someone vulnerable to make him feel better. I know, I've been there. She needs to get away from him but she needs someone to help her. Try to get her to snap out of it, then tell her to pack whatever she can and take her somewhere he won't find her. You can always start again as long as you're still alive.
Simple to explain, hard to do!
'; The victim will get sick and tired of being sick and tired.';
Everytime that person goes back, they are then a ';volunteer victim.'; It takes more courage to walk away....Be a support, help them help themselves! Without confidence, they will just stay until they are beaten completely. Make sure you notify the proper channels for assistance. They are confidential and very assertive.
best wishes
Loh.
Just let them know that you are there for them, and that your are worried about them. Point out that life is too short not to be happy everyday. Never put someone a priority that treats you like an option. Their worth it!
Ask them why they like the abuse. They must like it, they sit there and take it.
physical abuse? you call the police for them. Emotional? tell them to dump that jackas$
Just try and build up their self esteem...tell them they are too great to put up with this abuse and they would be better off without the person. Help them come up with a plan so they can leave safely. Sometimes, for whatever reason, people just aren't ready to leave...but hopefully when they realize someone cares for them and things they are a worthy person, that will give them the help they need.
there is nothing you can say to that person -- her love and devotion to that person is more powerful than any friendship
I need advice (relationship)?
yes, i've resorted to asking on yahoo.
what do you do when you're talking to someone and you start falling for someone else?I need advice (relationship)?
Then you move on to the other person.
I know it's probably a really confusing situation, and you yourself probably don't even know how you feel about it.
If you are going out with the first person, maybe wait a bit, but if not, then the other person is free game. All in all, even if you aren't going out with person A, if you think you are ';falling'; for person B, then it is probably wise to just move on, because the current relationship must not be very strong.I need advice (relationship)?
you need to give yourself time alone and think about the qualities you are looking for in a man. once you've done that then think about the pet peeves that you have against a man and figure out which one is best for you. i know advice never seems to be followed but by giving yourself time alone and thinking really what you want in life with a man is important for your future with him. im sorry if i did not make any sense but its reality. and don't be afraid to speak your mind or feel that you are going to hurt anyone because your not. you're only getting what you deserve and selfishness sometimes is ok. but don't get carried away.
what do you do when you're talking to someone and you start falling for someone else?I need advice (relationship)?
Then you move on to the other person.
I know it's probably a really confusing situation, and you yourself probably don't even know how you feel about it.
If you are going out with the first person, maybe wait a bit, but if not, then the other person is free game. All in all, even if you aren't going out with person A, if you think you are ';falling'; for person B, then it is probably wise to just move on, because the current relationship must not be very strong.I need advice (relationship)?
you need to give yourself time alone and think about the qualities you are looking for in a man. once you've done that then think about the pet peeves that you have against a man and figure out which one is best for you. i know advice never seems to be followed but by giving yourself time alone and thinking really what you want in life with a man is important for your future with him. im sorry if i did not make any sense but its reality. and don't be afraid to speak your mind or feel that you are going to hurt anyone because your not. you're only getting what you deserve and selfishness sometimes is ok. but don't get carried away.
Can Someone Please Give Me Advice On My Relationship...?
Im a Libra and my Gf is a Cancer, and I really like her, but our relationship is kind of at a stand-still. I just cant seem to figure out how she works. LoL. Shes a very aggressive flirt and we keep running into issue of showing affection (and no we have not and will not have sex). I just need some advice. Thanks. :) Can Someone Please Give Me Advice On My Relationship...?
im a cancer.
cancers dont hold back and love to be really flirty and go for what they want, so she is agressivly flirting because she likes you (:Can Someone Please Give Me Advice On My Relationship...?
Stick with first - third bases?
stick with whatevers comfortable now and there won't be as many issues, and then gradually work upon that.
but if your the one thats not affectionate (I'm guessing you are) than
COME ON DUDE
SHOW YOUR GIRL SOME LOVE
im a cancer.
cancers dont hold back and love to be really flirty and go for what they want, so she is agressivly flirting because she likes you (:Can Someone Please Give Me Advice On My Relationship...?
Stick with first - third bases?
stick with whatevers comfortable now and there won't be as many issues, and then gradually work upon that.
but if your the one thats not affectionate (I'm guessing you are) than
COME ON DUDE
SHOW YOUR GIRL SOME LOVE
What advice would you give when you think your family is ruining your relationship?
advice i would give is to just ignore them and get on with ur relationship, dont let them feel they are superior to uWhat advice would you give when you think your family is ruining your relationship?
I went through that, just ignore it if you can. If not, move away.What advice would you give when you think your family is ruining your relationship?
I'd sit my family down and have a talk with them
Really, if your family is the one stopping you from being happy, don't listen to them, Family shouldnt be that involved in your love life anyways.
i would ask myself,why do they do that,if there is any logical reason,maybe i'm wrong
I went through that, just ignore it if you can. If not, move away.What advice would you give when you think your family is ruining your relationship?
I'd sit my family down and have a talk with them
Really, if your family is the one stopping you from being happy, don't listen to them, Family shouldnt be that involved in your love life anyways.
i would ask myself,why do they do that,if there is any logical reason,maybe i'm wrong
Please help me with this relationship, please give me good advice cuz i could use it?
Should I e-mail or call my ex, we have been together for two years and broken up for 3 weeks, he broke up with me over an argument and never once called me except when he called my job and hang up. but i still have strong feelings for him, see i still love this guy and want to be with him, and I don't know if he still loves me or how he feels, but he still has our pics together on the web and its giving me hope, what should i do. or should I leave it the way it is.Please help me with this relationship, please give me good advice cuz i could use it?
Give it a couple of weeks more. Then call and casually ask how he is doing. His reaction will tell you what to do next.
Give it a couple of weeks more. Then call and casually ask how he is doing. His reaction will tell you what to do next.
I need some huge relationship advice...?
listen i have a great girlfriend and I really love her. we've dated for about 7 monthes and it has gotten pretty serious. I am a sophmore, she is a junior. We never get in fights and etc. we both dont party and drink and would never cheat on each other. But she is still a year older. I keep worrying about the future if we can last while she is done with High school. i keep thinking ';is it worth it if its gonna end anyway?'; I'll be a senior and she'll prob. go to college instate, but i still am worried. I believe we could make it a year in a city apart. I know we still got a year and then some but can I get some advice to stop worrying or maybe get some reassurance? thank you.I need some huge relationship advice...?
It's understandable to be concerned. I'd been with my boyfriend for 3 years before we had to start thinking about uni but in the end we broke up before we went because of not wanting to limit experiences etc. We went to uni (the same one just cause that's how it turned out) and then realised that uni wasn't that big a deal and it was much better to be together. Why don't you bring it up with her, chances are she's been thinking about it too as it's a big thing.
But yeah, don't break up just because of uni, in hindsight you'll be able to understand why better. If you both want it to work then it will but don't force it and enjoy the time you've got just now.I need some huge relationship advice...?
Talk, talk, talk, talk about your worries. She may have worries about the future too. That way you can come up with a plan on how to deal with the situation when it arrives. If you both have a plan, you'll worry less as you'll know what to do when the time comes.
Stay with her. Your in highschool and you should have fun with her while she is there and deal with the issues when they come. Since you both dont party and your sure she wont cheat on you, you will last the year.
all i got to say is high school dating is a waste of time! don't sweat it, if yall break up you break up. It's better to date when you are old aka more mature! good luck
Honey, as long as you love one another, you'll be fine. You have nothing to worry about as long as the love is there.
Don't worry. Just love her. Seen the same sit. and it worked. Cheers :)
dude if you love each other everything will be fine...............awww you guys sound like a cute couple.
have hope!
dude. calm down. if she really loves u, then shell call u and yall can meet up. just breathe!makeup class
It's understandable to be concerned. I'd been with my boyfriend for 3 years before we had to start thinking about uni but in the end we broke up before we went because of not wanting to limit experiences etc. We went to uni (the same one just cause that's how it turned out) and then realised that uni wasn't that big a deal and it was much better to be together. Why don't you bring it up with her, chances are she's been thinking about it too as it's a big thing.
But yeah, don't break up just because of uni, in hindsight you'll be able to understand why better. If you both want it to work then it will but don't force it and enjoy the time you've got just now.I need some huge relationship advice...?
Talk, talk, talk, talk about your worries. She may have worries about the future too. That way you can come up with a plan on how to deal with the situation when it arrives. If you both have a plan, you'll worry less as you'll know what to do when the time comes.
Stay with her. Your in highschool and you should have fun with her while she is there and deal with the issues when they come. Since you both dont party and your sure she wont cheat on you, you will last the year.
all i got to say is high school dating is a waste of time! don't sweat it, if yall break up you break up. It's better to date when you are old aka more mature! good luck
Honey, as long as you love one another, you'll be fine. You have nothing to worry about as long as the love is there.
Don't worry. Just love her. Seen the same sit. and it worked. Cheers :)
dude if you love each other everything will be fine...............awww you guys sound like a cute couple.
have hope!
dude. calm down. if she really loves u, then shell call u and yall can meet up. just breathe!
Can i get some relationship advice please?
the thing is im dating this unbelievable girl. I dated her once for two months, and we broke up cuz she said it was easier when we were just friends. i guess i had trouble being myself and that was that. then we started talking and ae dating once again. we are way more flirty and we do way more stuff together. but lately, it almost feels like it was when we first dated. the phone conversations had been really more quiet, and iam afraid that i might go back to my old ways. should i not talk to her for a couple of days (unless she calls me)? do i stop talking after i run out of things to say? i dont want it to be like the first time, cuz i really like this girl.Can i get some relationship advice please?
treat her like one of your friends (guy) girls like men to be comfortable with them and at the same time they DO NOT LIKE ACTING!Can i get some relationship advice please?
All right, this is what you have to do. Find out anyone she looks up to and see their characteristics (e.g. confidence etc.) and aspire to take up those traits. While you are doing this, ask more personal questions (e.g. what do you plan to do later in life etc.) and see where it takes you.
Been yourself is the most important part here. If you are not been yourself right now for how longg do you think that you can keep up. Talk to her, communication is very important in every relationship, and that way you both will know each other expectations for the realtionship. Ignoring her can only make it worst, that is a nono.
just dont drag out a conversation. unless shes interested in it. tease her but not too much. fight over who has the more comfier bed or couch. dont just bring up something random
dude just try and keep a conversation going, but she also has to want to talk. try and think of some new ideas or games to play or stuff to do. phone relationships are usually boring. come on i mean its just like freshmen in high school that are on the phone for 3 hours and dont say shiiii, we are pretty much all like that lol. just spice it up. go to a winery, jog, bike ride, tennis, frisbee, dinner, drive, movie, play, concert, just random fun crap.
treat her like one of your friends (guy) girls like men to be comfortable with them and at the same time they DO NOT LIKE ACTING!Can i get some relationship advice please?
All right, this is what you have to do. Find out anyone she looks up to and see their characteristics (e.g. confidence etc.) and aspire to take up those traits. While you are doing this, ask more personal questions (e.g. what do you plan to do later in life etc.) and see where it takes you.
Been yourself is the most important part here. If you are not been yourself right now for how longg do you think that you can keep up. Talk to her, communication is very important in every relationship, and that way you both will know each other expectations for the realtionship. Ignoring her can only make it worst, that is a nono.
just dont drag out a conversation. unless shes interested in it. tease her but not too much. fight over who has the more comfier bed or couch. dont just bring up something random
dude just try and keep a conversation going, but she also has to want to talk. try and think of some new ideas or games to play or stuff to do. phone relationships are usually boring. come on i mean its just like freshmen in high school that are on the phone for 3 hours and dont say shiiii, we are pretty much all like that lol. just spice it up. go to a winery, jog, bike ride, tennis, frisbee, dinner, drive, movie, play, concert, just random fun crap.
Another one of those relationship advice questions?
Right here we go,
There is this new girl who is working with me in a pub and we both catch on like a teenager with acne (without using all those acne medication stuff). She has a boyfriend and she has been with him for roughly 4 months but there are already problems so ive tried helping her get through the tough times (not revenge sex). The only reason she is with him is because she is afraid of being kicked out his house which I can understand, im still living with my parents (19) so its not like she can bunk with me. Would it be wise to just stay friends or let love take its course?
At work we have employee rooms above the pub (its a Beefeater/Premier Inn) but im not sure how much they cost per calender month/week or even if there are any spare rooms. Im willing to give up the holiday ive been saving up for the past 18 months and giving up smoking to save the extra cash.
I know this isn't exactly the best place to ask for advice but its a long shot I guess.
P.S sorry for the essay.Another one of those relationship advice questions?
Best thing I can think is if you can sometime when your alone talk to her an ask her what she thinks or feels is the right thingAnother one of those relationship advice questions?
if you have a good feeling about her i say go for it...and if you think of her as a friend type then just stay friends...and honestly if you want to give up your holiday is a gamble or walkout good moment. you could get the girl and be happy or lose the girl and no holiday or you can have the holiday...
Well, if you don't let love take it's course, you may miss out on the love of your life, and may regret it later on down the road. I'm all for the ';follow your heart'; thing, so I say go for it! Good luck.
Hi,
I appreciate your unique sincerity and wit to your question :) U must be from the UK too, i recognise the beefeater/premier inn, I'm in Scotland!
My gut feeling is, you obviously like this girl...a lot...but she's put u in a very difficult position. She has a boyfriend but she's (i'm assuming) spending a lot of time talking with you/perhaps flirting - whether her bf is an *** or not this is wrong. She might be afraid to be kicked out, very true but hasnt she got parents or friends (female) she can rely on? It would be great and impressive to do the hero thing and save up cash for her but it will only backfire, she needs to make these actions herself in order to prove to you she would want to be with u. There is no point in her letting u do the hardwork.
If I were you? I dont know does she know how u feel but its important you tell her. Everything. If you're falling for her u better tell her and tell her its difficult for you trying to be just the friend when u want more but you cant force her or make the big decisions for her like leaving her bf, she needs to be a big girl and do that for herself. U are also putting a lot of pressure on yourself by helping her out like u said because ur then obligated to help her in the future and u might not want to do that - she needs to be independent in this matter and then come back to you - whether for friendship or more. Do not give up your holiday, you'd really regret that, it sounds selfish but you need in this lifetime to look after number 1, and guide people in the beginning. If she were your girlfriend I would be thinking it were very sweet but she's not. She's actually betraying her bf a bit if u think about it - he might be the biggest idiot on earth but what does that say for her character you know? Would u like the same treatment done to you? I'd advise her what to do as a friend (move in with someone, move back home, get prices for her for the beefeater but dont pay a penny) and then u guys can make an adult decision about if theres anything between u.
Good luck - please comment back to me by editing your question, thanks xxx
P.S 4 months is not a long time to be going out with someone and living with them - that is a little crazy cos u dont know a person (clearly whats happened in her situation).
There is this new girl who is working with me in a pub and we both catch on like a teenager with acne (without using all those acne medication stuff). She has a boyfriend and she has been with him for roughly 4 months but there are already problems so ive tried helping her get through the tough times (not revenge sex). The only reason she is with him is because she is afraid of being kicked out his house which I can understand, im still living with my parents (19) so its not like she can bunk with me. Would it be wise to just stay friends or let love take its course?
At work we have employee rooms above the pub (its a Beefeater/Premier Inn) but im not sure how much they cost per calender month/week or even if there are any spare rooms. Im willing to give up the holiday ive been saving up for the past 18 months and giving up smoking to save the extra cash.
I know this isn't exactly the best place to ask for advice but its a long shot I guess.
P.S sorry for the essay.Another one of those relationship advice questions?
Best thing I can think is if you can sometime when your alone talk to her an ask her what she thinks or feels is the right thingAnother one of those relationship advice questions?
if you have a good feeling about her i say go for it...and if you think of her as a friend type then just stay friends...and honestly if you want to give up your holiday is a gamble or walkout good moment. you could get the girl and be happy or lose the girl and no holiday or you can have the holiday...
Well, if you don't let love take it's course, you may miss out on the love of your life, and may regret it later on down the road. I'm all for the ';follow your heart'; thing, so I say go for it! Good luck.
Hi,
I appreciate your unique sincerity and wit to your question :) U must be from the UK too, i recognise the beefeater/premier inn, I'm in Scotland!
My gut feeling is, you obviously like this girl...a lot...but she's put u in a very difficult position. She has a boyfriend but she's (i'm assuming) spending a lot of time talking with you/perhaps flirting - whether her bf is an *** or not this is wrong. She might be afraid to be kicked out, very true but hasnt she got parents or friends (female) she can rely on? It would be great and impressive to do the hero thing and save up cash for her but it will only backfire, she needs to make these actions herself in order to prove to you she would want to be with u. There is no point in her letting u do the hardwork.
If I were you? I dont know does she know how u feel but its important you tell her. Everything. If you're falling for her u better tell her and tell her its difficult for you trying to be just the friend when u want more but you cant force her or make the big decisions for her like leaving her bf, she needs to be a big girl and do that for herself. U are also putting a lot of pressure on yourself by helping her out like u said because ur then obligated to help her in the future and u might not want to do that - she needs to be independent in this matter and then come back to you - whether for friendship or more. Do not give up your holiday, you'd really regret that, it sounds selfish but you need in this lifetime to look after number 1, and guide people in the beginning. If she were your girlfriend I would be thinking it were very sweet but she's not. She's actually betraying her bf a bit if u think about it - he might be the biggest idiot on earth but what does that say for her character you know? Would u like the same treatment done to you? I'd advise her what to do as a friend (move in with someone, move back home, get prices for her for the beefeater but dont pay a penny) and then u guys can make an adult decision about if theres anything between u.
Good luck - please comment back to me by editing your question, thanks xxx
P.S 4 months is not a long time to be going out with someone and living with them - that is a little crazy cos u dont know a person (clearly whats happened in her situation).
Anyone feel like giving relationship advice?
in feburary, my girl friend told me to start texting this guy i never knew. i did and we started talking for a month and a half staright everyday. then i faded to be every other two days. anyway, we talked for 3 months and then he stopped texting for good. the conversations that we had seemed to be the same over and over again so i wouldnt reply with as much excitement and interesting things that i had in the beginning, he got the point i didnt want to talk to him anymore, when really i did and was playing hard to get. for the last month that we were talking and when we werent, we walked by each other every single day going to class, avoiding each other. at first it was awkward but then it became usual. i said hi to him once and he didnt reply so i never said anything again. when we did talk, he would say things to me like im watching a movie come cuddle with me and other things like that. we met up in a club and we danced for 2 songs and then i left. that night was the only time we actually talked in person though it was only for about 2 minutes. i've never been in a realtionship and was hoping that this could have been my first. i think that once we really get to know each other in person, we could make a cute couple. hes kind of a flirt to other girls and plays the field but he once talked about his ex and how he missed her so much, and that to me showed that he can commit to someone and really like them.im not sure what to do, im the type of girl that has the guy txt me and not txt them first. im afriad that its been 2 months since we've talked and it would be weird unless somehow he txt me first.
i get the feeling that he thought he had a chance with me, and he still does but i kinda just shut him down and seemed not interested in him. whats ur opinon?Anyone feel like giving relationship advice?
Start up a casual converstaipn and say like ';hey we haventb talked lately, what's up?'; or just say ';hey I'm bored, what been up with you lately?'; I've been in the same boat before and I txt him and it turned out that he simply thought I wasn't interested. Give it a go, what have you got to loose? Txting him first won't hurt you, unless you're too afraid of rejection. If he's not into you then oh we, there's other guys out there, better ones hat will actually talk to you and won't blow you off. Don't get so worried about one guy. Just try txting him and if that doesn't work out then get out and find someone else, but seriously, it can't hurt to try......Anyone feel like giving relationship advice?
You should text him something casual like ';Hey, haven't talked lately, what's up?';, or ask him about a fake question about a mutual friend. If he isn't interested then move on and find someone better.
Like you said. Make sure you really know each other in person before you enter in a relationship. He seems fairly interested so you might as well give it a shot. If he's sweet and polite, then it's a good idea.
you should text or call him and ask him if he wants to hang out
tell him to f-u-c-k off sister!
The honest truth although you may not want to here it because a lot of times ppl ask questions looking for only one type of answer but you should really forget this guy. cuz really what kind of guy talks about how he misses his ex to a girl hes considering for his new gf. and what kind of guy if he really does like you and apparently ';plays the field'; so he should be outgoing never chats in person and he must know your shy so you'd think he'd step up and start a convo and be more interesting. hes obviously not the right guy for your first relationship, ive had a similar experience and it really hurt me that it didnt work out but now i have someone much better :) you will to!
Text him FIRST when you know hes not with friends and willl be showing anyone his phone or distracted by other people. Then just talk to him like normal, and WHAM out of no where ask if he wants to hangout one on one.
If he says no, move on.
If he says yes,
~~~~~~~Tell him how you feel in person. Not in a text!!!! You can see his facial expressions and hear his voice tone. ~~~~~~~~
i get the feeling that he thought he had a chance with me, and he still does but i kinda just shut him down and seemed not interested in him. whats ur opinon?Anyone feel like giving relationship advice?
Start up a casual converstaipn and say like ';hey we haventb talked lately, what's up?'; or just say ';hey I'm bored, what been up with you lately?'; I've been in the same boat before and I txt him and it turned out that he simply thought I wasn't interested. Give it a go, what have you got to loose? Txting him first won't hurt you, unless you're too afraid of rejection. If he's not into you then oh we, there's other guys out there, better ones hat will actually talk to you and won't blow you off. Don't get so worried about one guy. Just try txting him and if that doesn't work out then get out and find someone else, but seriously, it can't hurt to try......Anyone feel like giving relationship advice?
You should text him something casual like ';Hey, haven't talked lately, what's up?';, or ask him about a fake question about a mutual friend. If he isn't interested then move on and find someone better.
Like you said. Make sure you really know each other in person before you enter in a relationship. He seems fairly interested so you might as well give it a shot. If he's sweet and polite, then it's a good idea.
you should text or call him and ask him if he wants to hang out
tell him to f-u-c-k off sister!
The honest truth although you may not want to here it because a lot of times ppl ask questions looking for only one type of answer but you should really forget this guy. cuz really what kind of guy talks about how he misses his ex to a girl hes considering for his new gf. and what kind of guy if he really does like you and apparently ';plays the field'; so he should be outgoing never chats in person and he must know your shy so you'd think he'd step up and start a convo and be more interesting. hes obviously not the right guy for your first relationship, ive had a similar experience and it really hurt me that it didnt work out but now i have someone much better :) you will to!
Text him FIRST when you know hes not with friends and willl be showing anyone his phone or distracted by other people. Then just talk to him like normal, and WHAM out of no where ask if he wants to hangout one on one.
If he says no, move on.
If he says yes,
~~~~~~~Tell him how you feel in person. Not in a text!!!! You can see his facial expressions and hear his voice tone. ~~~~~~~~
Can i have some relationship advice? esp from guys?
i am 22 and new to relationships.
i am with my first proper bf and i was thinking about it, i am getting worried that i could become a little ott, and drive him away, which is obviously something that i dont want!
i just want to see the concensus is about what the really big no no moments are.
i just want to avoid making a mistake that will drive him away etc.
i am worried i may become too clingy as well... is there any advice to help prevent me goin overboard?
its all that kinda stuff...
thanksCan i have some relationship advice? esp from guys?
1st dont give him all he wants cz if u do he's gonna bored and dump u ..... take care of u look hair clothe something sexy be cool when ur with him confident and strong we dont like weak girls we like confident strong girls... u should both call each others ( he should a lil bit more )and invite each others guys appreciate when a girl invites them cz most them dont that proves them that ur not with him for money or any stuff :) (sure he should invite u more but from a while to another its nice) make him any surprise cz we like new things we dont like routine and old thingsCan i have some relationship advice? esp from guys?
Be faithful.
Being clingy sometimes is good. Holding and all that stuff, but only at certain times. Give him space. Don't call him every 10 minutes when he's out...most women do that because they don't trust the guy and if you don't trust someone, then don't stay with them. Be yourself.
Good questions....It really depends what he is like, some people like clingy, some dont. After like a month or so dont go saying how much you love him because thats just scary. Get to know what hes like, like the way he acts when with you and be the same tbh.
Maintain a balance between work, friends, boyfriend, chores, etc. and you'll be fine.
i am with my first proper bf and i was thinking about it, i am getting worried that i could become a little ott, and drive him away, which is obviously something that i dont want!
i just want to see the concensus is about what the really big no no moments are.
i just want to avoid making a mistake that will drive him away etc.
i am worried i may become too clingy as well... is there any advice to help prevent me goin overboard?
its all that kinda stuff...
thanksCan i have some relationship advice? esp from guys?
1st dont give him all he wants cz if u do he's gonna bored and dump u ..... take care of u look hair clothe something sexy be cool when ur with him confident and strong we dont like weak girls we like confident strong girls... u should both call each others ( he should a lil bit more )and invite each others guys appreciate when a girl invites them cz most them dont that proves them that ur not with him for money or any stuff :) (sure he should invite u more but from a while to another its nice) make him any surprise cz we like new things we dont like routine and old thingsCan i have some relationship advice? esp from guys?
Be faithful.
Being clingy sometimes is good. Holding and all that stuff, but only at certain times. Give him space. Don't call him every 10 minutes when he's out...most women do that because they don't trust the guy and if you don't trust someone, then don't stay with them. Be yourself.
Good questions....It really depends what he is like, some people like clingy, some dont. After like a month or so dont go saying how much you love him because thats just scary. Get to know what hes like, like the way he acts when with you and be the same tbh.
Maintain a balance between work, friends, boyfriend, chores, etc. and you'll be fine.
I really need some relationship advice Please Help Me?
so my bf and i have been together for four months, and we've been in love for three
tonight we last for an hour on the phone like always
im in college and he's still a senior in high school so we do the long distance thing
so he sounds upset and asks me why i am with him
i tell him i love him and that he is amazing
but none of this seems to work
he just keeps saying he isn't good enough for me and that i can find someone better he is actually crying while he is talking to me
i haven't seen him in over two months but we had a long weekend together this past week it was amazing and he knows i am at my best when i am with him
why is he doing this
he doesn't seem to listen to me at all at one point he said was trying to see how i would react to this like it was a test or something i pointed that out and i asked him why he was doing this
he said because im an idiot
i told him to stop talking like that but he is always so hard on myself
i asked him if this meant we were breaking up
he said no he loves me and wants to be with me more than anything
than he said to forget about it but i didn't
what is going on here???????I really need some relationship advice Please Help Me?
u got a weird bf that was trying to pull something off nd got confused himself lol
just ignore it if something like it happens again then dump him uve only been with him 4months thats not enough to say love
said it too soon unless uve talked to him really kool 4 like a year or 2
tonight we last for an hour on the phone like always
im in college and he's still a senior in high school so we do the long distance thing
so he sounds upset and asks me why i am with him
i tell him i love him and that he is amazing
but none of this seems to work
he just keeps saying he isn't good enough for me and that i can find someone better he is actually crying while he is talking to me
i haven't seen him in over two months but we had a long weekend together this past week it was amazing and he knows i am at my best when i am with him
why is he doing this
he doesn't seem to listen to me at all at one point he said was trying to see how i would react to this like it was a test or something i pointed that out and i asked him why he was doing this
he said because im an idiot
i told him to stop talking like that but he is always so hard on myself
i asked him if this meant we were breaking up
he said no he loves me and wants to be with me more than anything
than he said to forget about it but i didn't
what is going on here???????I really need some relationship advice Please Help Me?
u got a weird bf that was trying to pull something off nd got confused himself lol
just ignore it if something like it happens again then dump him uve only been with him 4months thats not enough to say love
said it too soon unless uve talked to him really kool 4 like a year or 2
How do you give relationship advice to the girl you love?
My girlfriend broke up with me 3 months ago. It was a little awkward at first, but soon we were good friends again, though I've never stopped loving her. We're able to confide everything to each other and give each other comfort and advice.
In those three months she started going out with a guy, but now she says she sees him more as a friend but is afraid to break up with him because it'll hurt him. Then she tells me she's falling in love with me again, and yesterday we were kissing before we knew it, and she says she doesn't regret cheating on him. We're basically having a relationship only the two of us know about.
She still hasn't broken up with him. She probably should, but she hates making people feel bad. So how am I supposed to give advice w/o appearing biased in my favor? Help us out, please?
And PLEASE don't judge her. She's having a really tough family life and that's probably why she's confused about relationships.How do you give relationship advice to the girl you love?
Well what I'd do is sorta give her more confidence and tell her that she should tell him sooner because if she doesn't and the other guy finds out then he'll be more hurt knowing that she cheated on him than breaking up with him. So tell her that and make her say it more nicely you know like: Hey well the truth is really truely think your a good person though the problem is is that I only see us as being friends. Make sure she doesn't say ';but'; because then its like saying you nice but your not right for me and it sounds like the thing you said before doesn't matter. If you know what I mean. So tell her not to stress. Good Luck!makeup class
In those three months she started going out with a guy, but now she says she sees him more as a friend but is afraid to break up with him because it'll hurt him. Then she tells me she's falling in love with me again, and yesterday we were kissing before we knew it, and she says she doesn't regret cheating on him. We're basically having a relationship only the two of us know about.
She still hasn't broken up with him. She probably should, but she hates making people feel bad. So how am I supposed to give advice w/o appearing biased in my favor? Help us out, please?
And PLEASE don't judge her. She's having a really tough family life and that's probably why she's confused about relationships.How do you give relationship advice to the girl you love?
Well what I'd do is sorta give her more confidence and tell her that she should tell him sooner because if she doesn't and the other guy finds out then he'll be more hurt knowing that she cheated on him than breaking up with him. So tell her that and make her say it more nicely you know like: Hey well the truth is really truely think your a good person though the problem is is that I only see us as being friends. Make sure she doesn't say ';but'; because then its like saying you nice but your not right for me and it sounds like the thing you said before doesn't matter. If you know what I mean. So tell her not to stress. Good Luck!
JEALOUSY! plesae help..urgent relationship advice needed!?
PLEASE READ :)
i have known this guy for awhile now, about a year. Everybody knows we have a 'thing' or we are linked to each other because he liked me as soon as we met and we used to look like we were together everytime we went out with friends (we kissed/held hands) were both 18 btw. Its really confusing because everybody says they dont understand why i go near him because although hes popular everyone says im wayy out of his leaugue and i have been with way hotter guys!
this has been going on awhile and i change my mind about him all the time, he has asked me out but i have said no and laughed it off alittle, but i get jealous everytime i see him with other girls even though i sometimes try not to show it. although we still speak hes showing interest in one particualr girl and its making me really upset, if i see pictures of them together it really hurts me. i know if i wanted i could go out with him, but its really hard to explain because im scared of getting close to him because people say he cant be trusted!! i honestly dont no what to do- but i have though about this and dont think i only want him because he likes someone else..! i think about him alot and im not really bothered about what people think, i just need to sort out how i feel!! hes also not the guy i could tell any of this too because it would confuse him and im not into telling people how i feel so that NOT an option! he also is very forward and we flirt alot so he knows how i feel i guess. so what should i do and why cant i make my mind up!
Zara. xJEALOUSY! plesae help..urgent relationship advice needed!?
Zara - he's a player. It's you that's on the line and people are telling you to not go there so don't. He's just trying to get some. He's after someone else. Go out with a hotter guy. Sometimes we dont want to listen to the people that actually do care about us, when you lust after something - and it's hard do to that especially when your so young. If you go, you will get hurt by the sound of things. If you start looking for someone else - you may still get hurt but just not by THAT guy.JEALOUSY! plesae help..urgent relationship advice needed!?
guys dont think like we do.. u may think u have pass enough message to him that u like him.. but as a guy he may not get it. if u want him to know that u like him, u need to tell him ';i like you!';. from ur story he seemed to be interested with u but as u are passing the wrong message.. he just gave up and go for another girl..
about someone say u deserve someone hotter... so childish! who say handsome guy goes with pretty chicks? it's how u feel that is matter... if u like him.. thats good enough a reason..
if u really like him, go to him and say '; i like you';. if he like u , he will accept u.. if he doesnt accept u... at least u can move on... better than now when u r guessing guessing only... life is short.. dont waste it guessing ... good luck girl!
Start talking to him more again. maybe you see him more as a friend over time. If you can trust him, try and get over him. Or, start going out and meeting more guys.
good luck :)
please answer my question its urgent. http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AjAfF3aqVElbyBt_lFNr.5ogBgx.;_ylv=3?qid=20090530044003AAZSfXF
judging by what you said, it defiantly sounds like you have feelings for him, and it sounds like he has feelings for you too. you either love him or you hate him. he obviously likes this girl and the last thing you want to do is break them up. i think you should just tell him how you feel. and maybe he might feel the exact same way in which case he will leave that other girl and he will go for you, which means he liked you all the time and that girl was just a way to make you jealous i guess... don't worry about what everyone says if you two like each other whats stopping you?
i have known this guy for awhile now, about a year. Everybody knows we have a 'thing' or we are linked to each other because he liked me as soon as we met and we used to look like we were together everytime we went out with friends (we kissed/held hands) were both 18 btw. Its really confusing because everybody says they dont understand why i go near him because although hes popular everyone says im wayy out of his leaugue and i have been with way hotter guys!
this has been going on awhile and i change my mind about him all the time, he has asked me out but i have said no and laughed it off alittle, but i get jealous everytime i see him with other girls even though i sometimes try not to show it. although we still speak hes showing interest in one particualr girl and its making me really upset, if i see pictures of them together it really hurts me. i know if i wanted i could go out with him, but its really hard to explain because im scared of getting close to him because people say he cant be trusted!! i honestly dont no what to do- but i have though about this and dont think i only want him because he likes someone else..! i think about him alot and im not really bothered about what people think, i just need to sort out how i feel!! hes also not the guy i could tell any of this too because it would confuse him and im not into telling people how i feel so that NOT an option! he also is very forward and we flirt alot so he knows how i feel i guess. so what should i do and why cant i make my mind up!
Zara. xJEALOUSY! plesae help..urgent relationship advice needed!?
Zara - he's a player. It's you that's on the line and people are telling you to not go there so don't. He's just trying to get some. He's after someone else. Go out with a hotter guy. Sometimes we dont want to listen to the people that actually do care about us, when you lust after something - and it's hard do to that especially when your so young. If you go, you will get hurt by the sound of things. If you start looking for someone else - you may still get hurt but just not by THAT guy.JEALOUSY! plesae help..urgent relationship advice needed!?
guys dont think like we do.. u may think u have pass enough message to him that u like him.. but as a guy he may not get it. if u want him to know that u like him, u need to tell him ';i like you!';. from ur story he seemed to be interested with u but as u are passing the wrong message.. he just gave up and go for another girl..
about someone say u deserve someone hotter... so childish! who say handsome guy goes with pretty chicks? it's how u feel that is matter... if u like him.. thats good enough a reason..
if u really like him, go to him and say '; i like you';. if he like u , he will accept u.. if he doesnt accept u... at least u can move on... better than now when u r guessing guessing only... life is short.. dont waste it guessing ... good luck girl!
Start talking to him more again. maybe you see him more as a friend over time. If you can trust him, try and get over him. Or, start going out and meeting more guys.
good luck :)
please answer my question its urgent. http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AjAfF3aqVElbyBt_lFNr.5ogBgx.;_ylv=3?qid=20090530044003AAZSfXF
judging by what you said, it defiantly sounds like you have feelings for him, and it sounds like he has feelings for you too. you either love him or you hate him. he obviously likes this girl and the last thing you want to do is break them up. i think you should just tell him how you feel. and maybe he might feel the exact same way in which case he will leave that other girl and he will go for you, which means he liked you all the time and that girl was just a way to make you jealous i guess... don't worry about what everyone says if you two like each other whats stopping you?
I need some good relationship advice hear?
I have been dating this girl for about a year. We have broken up and became friends, and then dated again. Now we are supposedly just friends, but the relationship has moved further now than it ever has before. We have become sexually active. Now this is my dilemma. She has a seperated husband and 2 kids with him. The reason we became friends is obvious. She is or was trying to work things out with him. He is kind of a jerk and is not really all that interested in working things out with her. And just recently she started taking a passionate liking to me. What I am trying to figure out is how to handle this situation. Do I just lay back and let her do what she needs to do. Bc honestly I like her. Or do I stop getting involved all together. I can't figure out what this girl is actually thinking. But just based on how passionate she was, she wasn't using me for sex. And she wants to do it again. I just don't want to be the end of a marriage, and I don't want to get hurt either. ThanksI need some good relationship advice hear?
Hi personally I would think twice about getting invoved with a married person. It's better to just be friends till the situation is resolved. Either she remains with her spouse or she doesn't. If you keep away at least you will not be ';blamed'; for the breakdown of a marriage. Another way to look at is this way. If this was your marriage, no matter how bad things were would you really want a third party to muddy the waters? Isn't better if the third party kept his distance so that you and your spouse can work things out? Even you decided to separate/divorce, if will be independant of a third party's influence. I think if this woman really loves you, she will eventualy come back to you after the marriage is over. But she should just focus of fixing her marriage (or deciding to end it) without hanging on to you for comfort. If she's the one, she will still come to you later. I think it doesn't hurt to give her space, but tell her why you are keeping away for the moment.
Hi personally I would think twice about getting invoved with a married person. It's better to just be friends till the situation is resolved. Either she remains with her spouse or she doesn't. If you keep away at least you will not be ';blamed'; for the breakdown of a marriage. Another way to look at is this way. If this was your marriage, no matter how bad things were would you really want a third party to muddy the waters? Isn't better if the third party kept his distance so that you and your spouse can work things out? Even you decided to separate/divorce, if will be independant of a third party's influence. I think if this woman really loves you, she will eventualy come back to you after the marriage is over. But she should just focus of fixing her marriage (or deciding to end it) without hanging on to you for comfort. If she's the one, she will still come to you later. I think it doesn't hurt to give her space, but tell her why you are keeping away for the moment.
Please help me need relationship advice. Guys especially.?
Well,
Me and my bf of a 1 year and a half just broke up. It has only been a week and he says that he loves me but is not in love with me and that really broke my heart. However, He says we are done for a while he is confused to what he wants and says that maybe he will realize what he has but right now he needs to figure out what he wants.
Will we ever get back together...? Please email me if u need more info to give me a better answer. I am so depressed I need help. Real help please...my email is dollarc2009@yahoo.comPlease help me need relationship advice. Guys especially.?
Well, you asked so here goes.
The guy is a feminized girly man that is using chick tactics on you. Every word out of his mouth is a lie. Get some self respect and dignity and tell this girl to hit the road. If he ';wants you back'; tell him you have better things to do with your time.Please help me need relationship advice. Guys especially.?
Yes you will get back, no you will not get back, Its really 50/50, its he's choice, all you can do is wait for him to give you the final answer. There are ways of you to make him change hes mind, such as do things and change, although i wouldnt recommend it, you should just let him choose, if you do things you would normally not do to make him get back with you, then he is getting back with you because of some one your not, its better if he gets back with you because he wants to be with you.
Me and my bf of a 1 year and a half just broke up. It has only been a week and he says that he loves me but is not in love with me and that really broke my heart. However, He says we are done for a while he is confused to what he wants and says that maybe he will realize what he has but right now he needs to figure out what he wants.
Will we ever get back together...? Please email me if u need more info to give me a better answer. I am so depressed I need help. Real help please...my email is dollarc2009@yahoo.comPlease help me need relationship advice. Guys especially.?
Well, you asked so here goes.
The guy is a feminized girly man that is using chick tactics on you. Every word out of his mouth is a lie. Get some self respect and dignity and tell this girl to hit the road. If he ';wants you back'; tell him you have better things to do with your time.Please help me need relationship advice. Guys especially.?
Yes you will get back, no you will not get back, Its really 50/50, its he's choice, all you can do is wait for him to give you the final answer. There are ways of you to make him change hes mind, such as do things and change, although i wouldnt recommend it, you should just let him choose, if you do things you would normally not do to make him get back with you, then he is getting back with you because of some one your not, its better if he gets back with you because he wants to be with you.
Can you help me with some advice on my relationship?
my boyfriend and i are always getting into little stupid fights over dumb things... we never stay mad at each other for more than a few hours then we make up and apologize and we're back to normal
we've only been together for one yr but we're very much in love
i dont wanna lose him so how can we stop fighting so much?
the problem is that both of us have a little bit of jealousy in us and we always think one is doing something wrong when we're apart for too longCan you help me with some advice on my relationship?
Relationships are based on trust and that's something that the two of you have to work on. It would probably help to talk about this to each other. You both have to realize that the two of you have insecurity issues, and see what you can do to help each other.
we've only been together for one yr but we're very much in love
i dont wanna lose him so how can we stop fighting so much?
the problem is that both of us have a little bit of jealousy in us and we always think one is doing something wrong when we're apart for too longCan you help me with some advice on my relationship?
Relationships are based on trust and that's something that the two of you have to work on. It would probably help to talk about this to each other. You both have to realize that the two of you have insecurity issues, and see what you can do to help each other.
What is your best advice for making a relationship work?
well i try to be honest, funny, supportive and...give him some space... it has work for meWhat is your best advice for making a relationship work?
communicationWhat is your best advice for making a relationship work?
My advice is: when you first go out with a guy have your relationship flow smoothly. try to avoid fighting. Also dont make your relationship move very fast. Dating can relate to baseball. You start out at homebase, and you are up to bat. You get a hit and you run to first base. First base is the first stage of your relationship. You cant run to second until you and your teamate are ready. Stay at first base for a while. If he moves to fast or you move to fast, your relationship might be an out(over)!!
communicationWhat is your best advice for making a relationship work?
My advice is: when you first go out with a guy have your relationship flow smoothly. try to avoid fighting. Also dont make your relationship move very fast. Dating can relate to baseball. You start out at homebase, and you are up to bat. You get a hit and you run to first base. First base is the first stage of your relationship. You cant run to second until you and your teamate are ready. Stay at first base for a while. If he moves to fast or you move to fast, your relationship might be an out(over)!!
If your in a relationship-Do you take advice from your single friends/family? and vice versa?
NoIf your in a relationship-Do you take advice from your single friends/family? and vice versa?
I listen to the advice, and if it seems right to me, I take itIf your in a relationship-Do you take advice from your single friends/family? and vice versa?
no, if they know so much about relationships, then they wouldnt be single.
rarely
why, I dont take advice from ppl that are single, they've had no experience! It wouldnt make much sense. My mom says: yes you could have a boyfreind... my dad is almost a total No at the idea. .... I still talk to him and little kids are telling me to breakup with him... I mean, they're 12, do you think im going to be taking advice from them?! ha..
No, that's like taking dieting tips from really fat people.
No way! I have heard some of their advice before on relationships and it never seems to be any good.
It is always safe to take advice from any as long as they got the experience about the problem.
FAMILY
MY FAMILY KNOW ME BEST AND THEY'RE VERY WISEmakeup class
I listen to the advice, and if it seems right to me, I take itIf your in a relationship-Do you take advice from your single friends/family? and vice versa?
no, if they know so much about relationships, then they wouldnt be single.
rarely
why, I dont take advice from ppl that are single, they've had no experience! It wouldnt make much sense. My mom says: yes you could have a boyfreind... my dad is almost a total No at the idea. .... I still talk to him and little kids are telling me to breakup with him... I mean, they're 12, do you think im going to be taking advice from them?! ha..
No, that's like taking dieting tips from really fat people.
No way! I have heard some of their advice before on relationships and it never seems to be any good.
It is always safe to take advice from any as long as they got the experience about the problem.
FAMILY
MY FAMILY KNOW ME BEST AND THEY'RE VERY WISE
Girls Kissing Advice (Please) So if someones in a new relationship, how long do you wait, before kissing herr?
You wait until she wants it..usually if she's stalling when you walk or drive her home that's a clue or if you catch her looking at your lips it's a sign that she's thinking about kissing you!Girls Kissing Advice (Please) So if someones in a new relationship, how long do you wait, before kissing herr?
You just gotta wait till the right moment. Could be like a couple days or maybe a couple weeksGirls Kissing Advice (Please) So if someones in a new relationship, how long do you wait, before kissing herr?
a couple of weeks
but it depends on the girl
You just gotta wait till the right moment. Could be like a couple days or maybe a couple weeksGirls Kissing Advice (Please) So if someones in a new relationship, how long do you wait, before kissing herr?
a couple of weeks
but it depends on the girl
No offense to anyone, but do you find it a bit humorous when a young teen gives sex/relationship advice here?
In reading the responses to some of these questions about homosexuality and gay/lesbian relationships, sometimes I run across answers from teens as young as 15, doling out advice on relationships and sex in areas such as sexual orientation.
And I must admit I'm highly amused in those situations, as it's highly unlikely that any 15-16 yo has had enough of a wellspring of experience from which to draw in order to give advice.
Don't get me wrong, I know it's well intentioned, but when you really get right down to it can you honestly conclude that a 15-16 yo has had a sufficient quantum of life experience to offer any type of authoritative opinion, particularly on subjects involving sex and alternative lifestyles?No offense to anyone, but do you find it a bit humorous when a young teen gives sex/relationship advice here?
Hey im a sophomore and I am a top contirbutor. You are probably like 67 and cant get a best answer on one question. I may have not been through everything that these people have, but I give them everything that I can offer.
I must admit, I am highly amused in this situation when an adult acts superior to teenagers and yet types like one. I understand some of us are not very smart, and suck at giving advice; but that goes for adult as well. I feel I am highly educated and I take pride in that. I help people the best I can, and I do good at it. If I hadnt broadcasted my age in a few of my questions, I bet no one would be able to guess my age.
agh.No offense to anyone, but do you find it a bit humorous when a young teen gives sex/relationship advice here?
I think it depends on the ';young person'; you refer to. Some of them have been through a lot at that age.
I don't find it humorous at at. Instead I find it rather sad that so many young teens lose out on their childhood, growing up too fast. I have seen and known personally 14 - 16 year old mothers. And 16 year old fathers. These young people should be worrying whether it is too young to hold hands or their first kiss. The morality has changed tremendously. It's not the kids fault. They are exposed to adult life on T.V. and movies they are allowed to watch. I can remember when it was a shocker when Lucy and Desi pushed their twin beds together on the I Love Lucy Show. Holy Moly look at them now. Same bed, sheets flapping to a good rhythm, only half covered on what is suppose to be innocent T.V. shows. I know of one T.V. Soap that has incest, lesbian and gay affairs, wives cheating on husbands, husbands cheating on wives. The kids watch this and take it all in.
Lol...
i agree with you completely, seriously your brilliant.
Can't argue with ya there!
Actually I have to laugh at some of the advice some of the older people give too!
Frankly, I'm no teenager (for a long time) -- and I'm offended. It seems to me that you are presumptuous, imperious, and arrogant.
For the record I knew I was attracted to other males by the age of 8 -- and by 16 was in a sexual relationship of two year's duration. I had no problem issuing advice at the time, and (obviously) I still don't. Likewise I listen to others, and that includes teenagers -- respectfully and carefully and consider what they have to say.
Teenagers often have NEW life experiences, different from what I've had, which allows them to issue exciting advice that takes into account things I can't -- and is far better than advice would be from, oh, I don't know -- people who are sure that they know more because they are my age or older.
Regards,
Reynolds Jones
believeinyou24@yahoo.com
Honestly...I agree to a extent.
I am only 19, and I'd have to tell you...my life has not been fun. I have gone through plenty of things to know a fair share about life. It makes me sad that so many adults think that a ';young'; person cannot possibly know what life is about.
But yes, if you are having trouble with your marrige or your life...and you take a 15 year olds adive...your a idiot.
Listen to someone that has at LEAST fully gone through puberty.
I'm still in love with the same person I was in love with when I was 12. I am well into my adult years now. I also knew plenty about sexual orientation, as I understood mine as a very young age. Teens understand alot more than people give them credit for.
LOL (laugh out loud)
Bottom line is that a good answer is a good answer no matter who it comes from...maybe they're less likely to give good answers. For the record I'm 19 and I've given lots of best answers for that kind of crap...maybe because the askers are only 15.
no.
a lot of teens know more then people give them credit for. they know their sexual orientation, i have a friend who knew she was bisexual at age 12. about sexual orientation, teenagers know exactly what the kids trying to figure it all out are feeling. they can offer advice. they've had same-sex romances. a lot of them have had sex. they've had comprehensive sex-ed classes and can offer advice on contraception. the know how it feels to be dumped and what it's like to not be straight in high school. they answer a question when they know, or at least think they know, about what they're talking about. and no one's saying the answers here are authoritative. they're doing their best and their answers can be some of the truest and most honest answers there are. i can see how it would be funny to an adult, however. teens like me offer what they have and it can be just what the other person needs, especially if the other person is a teenager themselves. if the answers are good and honest and helpful, don't nitpick.
No
Excuse me, but I frequently give advice on sex and relationships, and I'm fifteen. Just because we're young, doesn't mean we're idiots. Sure, some (read: most) of us are, but I'm not, and neither are lots of teens. Trust me, I know a LOT about sexual orientation and relationships, having struggled with both. I've had a lot of experience, and know what the hell I'm talking about. So get off your high horse.
Effing adults...
ok.
im 16.
and well i have had sex. several times.
and i have lived life alot.
wether i am young. it does no difference.
one shoudl not generalize because of some who dont't tend to give good advice.
i am 16 but i have been in gay foru8ms way before. like 13 and so. and at that age i would not give the advic e btu ask for it. and as i develop. i became more into it and more experience and grow to understand and comprehend several stuff.
you dont know what i have gone through, so you are just making a generalization.
i read several boooiks, sites, and everythign dealing with relationships and sex. and therefore i am well capable of giving advice wether young or not. so are you jumping to conclusions and assuming all older people tend to give better advice?
no.
depending on the teen, adult, etc. what they ahve gone through,experienced, read, and their are several acpects of a person that determines how well they understand stuff.
and plz dont generalize people.
thnk you.!
No it's not. I'm 15, and I've already been giving a lot of sexual advice in forums, and they like it very much.
Of course, it's different than other teens. I read a lot of books, from kamasutra from india, and futari ecchi from Japan, etc.
I know more than just techniques, some times I advise people the mindset they need to have, choosing the right time, solutions for medical problems, and things they need to know before first sex or marriage.
well; yes but at the age of 15 and 16 thats when you notice your sexuality, but any younger than 15 - thats FUNNYYYY
that is amussing.
Yes I do especially when it is not true
no i don't think it's humorous...teens are talking to each other, giving each other the benefit of what has happened to them, what they think, how they feel. at least they understand each other better than older folks might...and they know better where another teen is ';coming from';.
yes, true...older people have more life experience...but Everyone here can reach out to others, and offer what they have...teens as well as the rest of us.
yes some teens are silly, or obnoxious. but not all of them. some of them are very thoughtful...and have good insight. let them have their say.
haha, that makes me laugh too. I'm only 17, but I recognize that it's very very rare that a young person like me can have the type of experience required in order to give valuable advice.
Yes , cant help to agree with that .
Its the raging hormones.
Yes, I hate it. It's usually spelled wrong and is complete crap.
OMG liek i herd if u eat a banananana b4 u have sex then u n ur bf will not get stis rite? what duz ne1 think??????
If people don't know how to spell, how to use contraceptives properly, and are underaged, they shouldn't be having sex or offering sex advice.
Well you have to realise that many of the askers are 15-16 themselves, so perhaps people their age can relate more.
I'm only 20, but had more things happen to me in those years than many people have happen to them in their lifetime!
In the end of the day all you can do is share your experience on the subject, however big or small.
I just LOOK 15 or 16 in my pics. I'm not though. I'm 27.
But, in the defense of some of these kids, I know some of them have been through a lot by their age. Hell, by the time I was 24, I had already been outed as a lesbian in my high school, beaten up for it, thought maybe I was bi, had my sister in a relationship with a butch lesbian woman, went through my own coming out as ';lesbian'; or what I thought was lesbian, got married to a bio man, had a child, got a divorce, went to the military, started transition from female to male and started college. Don't underestimate some of them.
And I must admit I'm highly amused in those situations, as it's highly unlikely that any 15-16 yo has had enough of a wellspring of experience from which to draw in order to give advice.
Don't get me wrong, I know it's well intentioned, but when you really get right down to it can you honestly conclude that a 15-16 yo has had a sufficient quantum of life experience to offer any type of authoritative opinion, particularly on subjects involving sex and alternative lifestyles?No offense to anyone, but do you find it a bit humorous when a young teen gives sex/relationship advice here?
Hey im a sophomore and I am a top contirbutor. You are probably like 67 and cant get a best answer on one question. I may have not been through everything that these people have, but I give them everything that I can offer.
I must admit, I am highly amused in this situation when an adult acts superior to teenagers and yet types like one. I understand some of us are not very smart, and suck at giving advice; but that goes for adult as well. I feel I am highly educated and I take pride in that. I help people the best I can, and I do good at it. If I hadnt broadcasted my age in a few of my questions, I bet no one would be able to guess my age.
agh.No offense to anyone, but do you find it a bit humorous when a young teen gives sex/relationship advice here?
I think it depends on the ';young person'; you refer to. Some of them have been through a lot at that age.
I don't find it humorous at at. Instead I find it rather sad that so many young teens lose out on their childhood, growing up too fast. I have seen and known personally 14 - 16 year old mothers. And 16 year old fathers. These young people should be worrying whether it is too young to hold hands or their first kiss. The morality has changed tremendously. It's not the kids fault. They are exposed to adult life on T.V. and movies they are allowed to watch. I can remember when it was a shocker when Lucy and Desi pushed their twin beds together on the I Love Lucy Show. Holy Moly look at them now. Same bed, sheets flapping to a good rhythm, only half covered on what is suppose to be innocent T.V. shows. I know of one T.V. Soap that has incest, lesbian and gay affairs, wives cheating on husbands, husbands cheating on wives. The kids watch this and take it all in.
Lol...
i agree with you completely, seriously your brilliant.
Can't argue with ya there!
Actually I have to laugh at some of the advice some of the older people give too!
Frankly, I'm no teenager (for a long time) -- and I'm offended. It seems to me that you are presumptuous, imperious, and arrogant.
For the record I knew I was attracted to other males by the age of 8 -- and by 16 was in a sexual relationship of two year's duration. I had no problem issuing advice at the time, and (obviously) I still don't. Likewise I listen to others, and that includes teenagers -- respectfully and carefully and consider what they have to say.
Teenagers often have NEW life experiences, different from what I've had, which allows them to issue exciting advice that takes into account things I can't -- and is far better than advice would be from, oh, I don't know -- people who are sure that they know more because they are my age or older.
Regards,
Reynolds Jones
believeinyou24@yahoo.com
Honestly...I agree to a extent.
I am only 19, and I'd have to tell you...my life has not been fun. I have gone through plenty of things to know a fair share about life. It makes me sad that so many adults think that a ';young'; person cannot possibly know what life is about.
But yes, if you are having trouble with your marrige or your life...and you take a 15 year olds adive...your a idiot.
Listen to someone that has at LEAST fully gone through puberty.
I'm still in love with the same person I was in love with when I was 12. I am well into my adult years now. I also knew plenty about sexual orientation, as I understood mine as a very young age. Teens understand alot more than people give them credit for.
LOL (laugh out loud)
Bottom line is that a good answer is a good answer no matter who it comes from...maybe they're less likely to give good answers. For the record I'm 19 and I've given lots of best answers for that kind of crap...maybe because the askers are only 15.
no.
a lot of teens know more then people give them credit for. they know their sexual orientation, i have a friend who knew she was bisexual at age 12. about sexual orientation, teenagers know exactly what the kids trying to figure it all out are feeling. they can offer advice. they've had same-sex romances. a lot of them have had sex. they've had comprehensive sex-ed classes and can offer advice on contraception. the know how it feels to be dumped and what it's like to not be straight in high school. they answer a question when they know, or at least think they know, about what they're talking about. and no one's saying the answers here are authoritative. they're doing their best and their answers can be some of the truest and most honest answers there are. i can see how it would be funny to an adult, however. teens like me offer what they have and it can be just what the other person needs, especially if the other person is a teenager themselves. if the answers are good and honest and helpful, don't nitpick.
No
Excuse me, but I frequently give advice on sex and relationships, and I'm fifteen. Just because we're young, doesn't mean we're idiots. Sure, some (read: most) of us are, but I'm not, and neither are lots of teens. Trust me, I know a LOT about sexual orientation and relationships, having struggled with both. I've had a lot of experience, and know what the hell I'm talking about. So get off your high horse.
Effing adults...
ok.
im 16.
and well i have had sex. several times.
and i have lived life alot.
wether i am young. it does no difference.
one shoudl not generalize because of some who dont't tend to give good advice.
i am 16 but i have been in gay foru8ms way before. like 13 and so. and at that age i would not give the advic e btu ask for it. and as i develop. i became more into it and more experience and grow to understand and comprehend several stuff.
you dont know what i have gone through, so you are just making a generalization.
i read several boooiks, sites, and everythign dealing with relationships and sex. and therefore i am well capable of giving advice wether young or not. so are you jumping to conclusions and assuming all older people tend to give better advice?
no.
depending on the teen, adult, etc. what they ahve gone through,experienced, read, and their are several acpects of a person that determines how well they understand stuff.
and plz dont generalize people.
thnk you.!
No it's not. I'm 15, and I've already been giving a lot of sexual advice in forums, and they like it very much.
Of course, it's different than other teens. I read a lot of books, from kamasutra from india, and futari ecchi from Japan, etc.
I know more than just techniques, some times I advise people the mindset they need to have, choosing the right time, solutions for medical problems, and things they need to know before first sex or marriage.
well; yes but at the age of 15 and 16 thats when you notice your sexuality, but any younger than 15 - thats FUNNYYYY
that is amussing.
Yes I do especially when it is not true
no i don't think it's humorous...teens are talking to each other, giving each other the benefit of what has happened to them, what they think, how they feel. at least they understand each other better than older folks might...and they know better where another teen is ';coming from';.
yes, true...older people have more life experience...but Everyone here can reach out to others, and offer what they have...teens as well as the rest of us.
yes some teens are silly, or obnoxious. but not all of them. some of them are very thoughtful...and have good insight. let them have their say.
haha, that makes me laugh too. I'm only 17, but I recognize that it's very very rare that a young person like me can have the type of experience required in order to give valuable advice.
Yes , cant help to agree with that .
Its the raging hormones.
Yes, I hate it. It's usually spelled wrong and is complete crap.
OMG liek i herd if u eat a banananana b4 u have sex then u n ur bf will not get stis rite? what duz ne1 think??????
If people don't know how to spell, how to use contraceptives properly, and are underaged, they shouldn't be having sex or offering sex advice.
Well you have to realise that many of the askers are 15-16 themselves, so perhaps people their age can relate more.
I'm only 20, but had more things happen to me in those years than many people have happen to them in their lifetime!
In the end of the day all you can do is share your experience on the subject, however big or small.
I just LOOK 15 or 16 in my pics. I'm not though. I'm 27.
But, in the defense of some of these kids, I know some of them have been through a lot by their age. Hell, by the time I was 24, I had already been outed as a lesbian in my high school, beaten up for it, thought maybe I was bi, had my sister in a relationship with a butch lesbian woman, went through my own coming out as ';lesbian'; or what I thought was lesbian, got married to a bio man, had a child, got a divorce, went to the military, started transition from female to male and started college. Don't underestimate some of them.
Ex girlfreind visits to see our children but its making it hard for me to have a new relationship,advice?
I want to move on and find new girlfreind, however my ex gothic girlfreind visits to see our 3 children that live with me . we are still freinds and thats good for the kids but it puts off any new female freinds i meet. Tried dating sites but most people are as crazy as her but also phycotic. She just submitted a question about me (now deleted) from my profile regarding how she would like to punish me in a sexual way because she thinks i like it and will come running when she wants me to. Thing is that turns me on and i sometimes give in to her.so that also stops me from building a relation ship with someone. All i want is to settle down with a nice but occasional very naughty woman. Any ideas ? Please be kind (unless your a woman,lol)Ex girlfreind visits to see our children but its making it hard for me to have a new relationship,advice?
First, set some boundaries with her and with yourself. For you, stop looking at any of her online profiles. For her, if she's not talking about the kids, immediately shut her down. Don't let her talk to her inappropriately or like she's still your girlfriend. ';That topic is not open for discussion. Anything you need to know about the kids? No, ok, I'm hanging up now (or leaving).'; And do it.
First, set some boundaries with her and with yourself. For you, stop looking at any of her online profiles. For her, if she's not talking about the kids, immediately shut her down. Don't let her talk to her inappropriately or like she's still your girlfriend. ';That topic is not open for discussion. Anything you need to know about the kids? No, ok, I'm hanging up now (or leaving).'; And do it.
I want to ask her to be my girlfriend, but I am afraid to pursue a long distance relationship...advice please?
So i have been friends/dating this girl for about a year. she's great, from the moment a met her i knew there was something special about her. I didn't want to rush things by asking for a relationship at the time because I really wanted to get to know her. I feel like people should have a good friendship before pursuing a relationship....so anyway, i had to move back to my hometown which is about an hour and half away from her. I went to see her about two weeks ago and i knew then that i wanted her to be my girlfriend. the thing is, i've never had a girlfriend before. so i'm not sure how it works. we have hinted at becoming a couple, but that's it. I'm not certain as how I should go about asking her or having this conversation. So could you guys help?
I am in my early 20s over 21, if that's necessary. And i probably won't be able to se her for a few weeks. I don't wait anymore because she has said other people like and I like her so much, I don't want to slip between my fingersI want to ask her to be my girlfriend, but I am afraid to pursue a long distance relationship...advice please?
sounds like you're already girlfriends- you said '; we have hinted about being a couple';. well, be definitive and don't just hint- talk with her and if she feels the same way it's it's a partnership! go for it! i've done it and it works- when i first met my gf there was electricity i could almost see! i took it one step at a time (quickly) and it worked! best to you both !!!
I am in my early 20s over 21, if that's necessary. And i probably won't be able to se her for a few weeks. I don't wait anymore because she has said other people like and I like her so much, I don't want to slip between my fingersI want to ask her to be my girlfriend, but I am afraid to pursue a long distance relationship...advice please?
sounds like you're already girlfriends- you said '; we have hinted about being a couple';. well, be definitive and don't just hint- talk with her and if she feels the same way it's it's a partnership! go for it! i've done it and it works- when i first met my gf there was electricity i could almost see! i took it one step at a time (quickly) and it worked! best to you both !!!
Relationship issues here, need serious advice ?
I have a boyfriend and he is sweet and all, he's is most of the time negative about himself, Always down. H e doesn't have a job yet and he thinks that I am greater than him because I graduated from college, have a job and he has only 2 subjects left and jobless . I am always there for him but sometimes, I need his help the most and he becomes negative about himself again. I love him dearly and I know we can work things out but sometimes, it's really nerve wrecking.What should I do to him? Should I be still supportive?Relationship issues here, need serious advice ?
I know how frustrating it is, I had a girlfriend that was exactly the same way, and in retrospect, I'd advise you to stay with him -- abandonment will not improve his self-image, it'll only make him feel worse. It sounds like he's in a negative self-reinforcing cycle, focusing only on what he perceives to be the negative aspects of himself, which, when highlighted, only serve to reinforce their existence. To combat this, actively and frequently complement him on his abilities, and do and say things to and for him that make him feel wanted and needed. Be suggestive, but not demanding, in trying to get him to change his outlook in an attempt to break the cycle. Most importantly, however, would be to get him to seek counseling, as the hardest part of changing one's self is figuring out how to change, which is the function of the counselor. Anyway, good luck and stick with it.
Regards.Relationship issues here, need serious advice ?
It sounds like he has very low self esteem. Counselling would be a fantastic idea for him but hes gotta be willing to go. It also possible that he may need anti depressants. Counselling was great for me and thankfully no meds. I also found that positive affirmations helped. They make you feel a little silly telling yourself in the mirror that you are great and wonderful etc but it works! You are what you think... Also could try sticking little notes up in places he passes each day saying thinks like, I am smart, wonderful, can do anything etc. its all about reprogramming the sub-concious. The more you tell yourself something the more you believe it and the more truth comes of it as you start to live it. He just needs to take the negatives and make them positives. You say he is a great boyfriend and it doesn't sound like he degrades or abuses you so Id say stick by him. It wouldnt hurt to remind him from time to time of his good qualities and why you love him...give it time he will come good :-)
Look it not you or him i had this problem myself personally but some time you have to hear him out and listen to him dont listen to people tell you that you dont need him or he is worthless. The best thing you need to do is comfort him let him know that thing will look up and that he will get his due. also help him out let him know thing he can do try to make him feel importmant also hen he feels worthless tell him look baby i know you feel down about you self but i want you to know that you make me happy the way you are. Also say hey look there thing you can do to help him out try to help him find a job or try helping him educated himself.
I'd try to be supportive in a ';crutch to aid walking to the job centre sense'; rather than a ';there there, it'll all be ok because i love you no matter'; sense.
The only thing that's gonna make him feel better about himself is proving he's better than his failed education.
Don't make him feel worse, but tough love never hurt anyone, and it sounds to me that you need to kick him hard before u have no hair left to tear out. x
no, you shouldn't because your supportive character has encouraged him to keep on going over the same fact over and over again, you need to tell him to stop cause that's not the way. And if he's not threaten him that you will leave him if he doesn't see life more positively... or just take him to counseling or something :p
be there for him as u do now, to me sounds like you are doing your best, is really hard for a guy to be in that situation...but he can get a temporarty job for the moment so he doesnt feel useless...if he really wants to work I dont see where is the problem..u dont need a college degree to get a job..or he can do some house work and help u out a bit..give him little tasks that will make him feel usuful..
good luck
yes still be suppostive. my boyfriend was like this just becasue i got a job before him and im younger. he suddently started hating himself saying his life is a waste of time ect ... they just need comforting and reasurance rearly just keep teeling him you love him and that your always going to be there to help.
all the best. xxx
Hey everyone needs some support sometime, thats why you have friends.
You should tell him what you think though.
Suggest that his negative thoughts get you down, there are a lot of people out there doing worse then he is.
If you're going to continue to enable this guy, by always being there to pick up him up every time he decides he wants to fall down, then be prepared for a life of disappointment. You don't need that. Seemingly, every time you need some moral support from him, he turns it around and then it's all about him again.
If you love him, and want to work things out with him, then you're going to have to develop a mean streak with him. Next time he wants to take a fall, instead of helping him up, give him a kick in the *** by making him realize that he's not the only one that may have problems. There are times that you need to deal with a few things and you need constructive and supportive input from him, not more of his weight on your shoulders. If he can't give it to you, then the best thing he can do is shut up and leave you alone.
If it has gotten to where your nerves are getting frayed, then it's time to reconsider your relationship. People have to move forward, and need people who are willing to move forward with them. This guy doesn't have a job, or even finished college. He doesn't seem to have any ambition or drive. He's holding you back with his outlook on life, his personal shortcomings, and general all round negative attitude.
I know how frustrating it is, I had a girlfriend that was exactly the same way, and in retrospect, I'd advise you to stay with him -- abandonment will not improve his self-image, it'll only make him feel worse. It sounds like he's in a negative self-reinforcing cycle, focusing only on what he perceives to be the negative aspects of himself, which, when highlighted, only serve to reinforce their existence. To combat this, actively and frequently complement him on his abilities, and do and say things to and for him that make him feel wanted and needed. Be suggestive, but not demanding, in trying to get him to change his outlook in an attempt to break the cycle. Most importantly, however, would be to get him to seek counseling, as the hardest part of changing one's self is figuring out how to change, which is the function of the counselor. Anyway, good luck and stick with it.
Regards.Relationship issues here, need serious advice ?
It sounds like he has very low self esteem. Counselling would be a fantastic idea for him but hes gotta be willing to go. It also possible that he may need anti depressants. Counselling was great for me and thankfully no meds. I also found that positive affirmations helped. They make you feel a little silly telling yourself in the mirror that you are great and wonderful etc but it works! You are what you think... Also could try sticking little notes up in places he passes each day saying thinks like, I am smart, wonderful, can do anything etc. its all about reprogramming the sub-concious. The more you tell yourself something the more you believe it and the more truth comes of it as you start to live it. He just needs to take the negatives and make them positives. You say he is a great boyfriend and it doesn't sound like he degrades or abuses you so Id say stick by him. It wouldnt hurt to remind him from time to time of his good qualities and why you love him...give it time he will come good :-)
Look it not you or him i had this problem myself personally but some time you have to hear him out and listen to him dont listen to people tell you that you dont need him or he is worthless. The best thing you need to do is comfort him let him know that thing will look up and that he will get his due. also help him out let him know thing he can do try to make him feel importmant also hen he feels worthless tell him look baby i know you feel down about you self but i want you to know that you make me happy the way you are. Also say hey look there thing you can do to help him out try to help him find a job or try helping him educated himself.
I'd try to be supportive in a ';crutch to aid walking to the job centre sense'; rather than a ';there there, it'll all be ok because i love you no matter'; sense.
The only thing that's gonna make him feel better about himself is proving he's better than his failed education.
Don't make him feel worse, but tough love never hurt anyone, and it sounds to me that you need to kick him hard before u have no hair left to tear out. x
no, you shouldn't because your supportive character has encouraged him to keep on going over the same fact over and over again, you need to tell him to stop cause that's not the way. And if he's not threaten him that you will leave him if he doesn't see life more positively... or just take him to counseling or something :p
be there for him as u do now, to me sounds like you are doing your best, is really hard for a guy to be in that situation...but he can get a temporarty job for the moment so he doesnt feel useless...if he really wants to work I dont see where is the problem..u dont need a college degree to get a job..or he can do some house work and help u out a bit..give him little tasks that will make him feel usuful..
good luck
yes still be suppostive. my boyfriend was like this just becasue i got a job before him and im younger. he suddently started hating himself saying his life is a waste of time ect ... they just need comforting and reasurance rearly just keep teeling him you love him and that your always going to be there to help.
all the best. xxx
Hey everyone needs some support sometime, thats why you have friends.
You should tell him what you think though.
Suggest that his negative thoughts get you down, there are a lot of people out there doing worse then he is.
If you're going to continue to enable this guy, by always being there to pick up him up every time he decides he wants to fall down, then be prepared for a life of disappointment. You don't need that. Seemingly, every time you need some moral support from him, he turns it around and then it's all about him again.
If you love him, and want to work things out with him, then you're going to have to develop a mean streak with him. Next time he wants to take a fall, instead of helping him up, give him a kick in the *** by making him realize that he's not the only one that may have problems. There are times that you need to deal with a few things and you need constructive and supportive input from him, not more of his weight on your shoulders. If he can't give it to you, then the best thing he can do is shut up and leave you alone.
If it has gotten to where your nerves are getting frayed, then it's time to reconsider your relationship. People have to move forward, and need people who are willing to move forward with them. This guy doesn't have a job, or even finished college. He doesn't seem to have any ambition or drive. He's holding you back with his outlook on life, his personal shortcomings, and general all round negative attitude.
My boyfriend fights a lot with me and talks bad about me sometimes i also need relationship advice please help?
see the thing is, my boyfriend is always trying to fight with me about something. he constantly misinterprets what i say, twist everything around to where it sounds like im judging him or trying to wrong him etc and tries to fight about that, he'll even fight with me if he says something and i throw in my opinion. he says that im the one starting a fight and that im contradicting everything he says and even puts me down sometimes. also sometimes if im a late getting somewhere to meet up with him he goes to my friends and his and calls me names. we just got engaged and are moving in together soon and i love him a lot and don't want things to be like this when we are living together, hes a very good and loving person for the most part but he changes all the sudden and it turns to all this, i don't know whats wrong with him. can someone please give me some advice on what i can do to fix this without him getting mad.My boyfriend fights a lot with me and talks bad about me sometimes i also need relationship advice please help?
Step 1. Tell him EXACTLY how you feel.
Step 2. Give him the chance to change or adapt to your needs while
guiding him and applying to same process to his needs.
Step 3. If he doesn't choose to, find a new boyfriend.
Simple.My boyfriend fights a lot with me and talks bad about me sometimes i also need relationship advice please help?
Find another bf. This guy has problems. Why put yourself through all his BS?
You're engaged to him? Why? You like fights? You think this is all going to magically change? He's got to change his behavior. It's unacceptable. It disrepectful. And where is your self-respect?
You're marrying him but you don't know what's wrong with him? Hello? Ask yourself why you are setting yourself up for misery and failure.
In a loving relationship the following tips may be useful to everyone -
路 Know yourself and be honest with yourself and love yourself -- first! Only then can you truly appreciate and love someone else.
路 Take good care of yourself. Treating yourself with respect and love is as important as respecting and loving your partner. Conduct yourself with dignity, even if you're very familiar with one another.
路 All good relationships are based upon mutual respect. If you do not feel respect for your partner, or believe your partner is losing respect for you, then consider ways of rebuilding it immediately. Respect is the key. If you have true respect for one another, then nothing can go wrong. You just have to find the right person to respect, this is the hard part.
路 Ask questions, clarify, don't assume. Do not talk if your mind is not clear or full of anger. When you feel hurt, do not say ';you don't love me / you never loved me'; or ';let's break up'; or ';when do you want to break up?';. You will regret one day. Tell him or her you feel hurt, and ask for clarification first.
路 Be the first to tell your partner, either positive or negative. Trust is as essential as respect. If you want your partner to trust you, trust him or her first. Letting your partner play guessing games may lead to misunderstanding and frustration. But, don't just tell him or her the issue, also talk about your plan to solve it.
路 Strike while the iron is cold. Know when to be reflective and invoke principles. When the house is burning is no time to teach fire safety principles.
路 Communicate with your partner. Without communication, there is no relationship. Stay in touch by, for example, calling your partner even if it's just to say 'hi' and 'I love you'.
路 Avoid any activity that could cause your partner to experience doubt, suspicion or distrust - build your credibility and earn trust and respect by always communicating truthfully and proactively, and always keep your words.
Hi dear you know what find a very good time and talk to him about his behaviour and how its affecting you give him some one week to see if there will be any change.If there isnt any change then dont waste your time please get out of the relationship cuz this is a sign of an abusive relationship to be so if you want to be verbally or physically abused in the future and if you wish for a bright future for your children then pls take precaution
I just found this great ebook been given out free. Its written by a relationship expert. It tells you clever techniques you need to know about approaching your crush, how to get their number and how to keep them yours and a bonus section includes a smart method to get your ex back and hes giving it out free for a very limited time so take advantage of it, please download it here while its still here http://rds.yahoo.com/**http%3a//www.bit.ly/WRQut
This is a horrible situation to be in, I have been in the exact same situation with a friend...and I'd hate to be the one to tell you, but he is a manipulatorative person, and you're pretty much locked in this relationship, and won't be happy until you state your mind! I know, he won't be 'happy' when he realizes he hasn't got you under complete control, but you are your own person, and a relationship is about supporting the other person, as well as being your own person, I cannot fret enough that you really really have to state your opinion in this relationship, otherwise one day you will just crack, and really hurt him. I know, your probably thinking ';I dont want him to be mad etc'; but EVERY relationship must include fights for it to be healthy, no matter how much you don't want to hear it. He most likely won't leave you for bringing it up, thats ridiculous, but IF he did (which he won't) you know hes not good for you. If hes like this now.. imagine what he could do to you later. Specially if he is bagging you out to YOUR friends, you need to confront him and tell him your p***ed off, because you have a right, and please don't be afraid, because I was for many years with my friend, and I was trapped under her wing, not being my own person until I just CRACKED and we had a massive fight almost tearing apart our friendship. Yet, now that she knows, its gotten better.
He may feel that you are verbally attacking him which could be why he's being so defensive. He might also think that by dissagreeing with him or giving him your opinion that you consider yourself more intelligent than he is. I know it sounds kinda crazy but I've been in a similar situation and that was the case. The best thing you can do is talk to him and see what's going on inside his head. It's likely that your fiance is sensitive and doesn't like being told what to do because he thinks that you consider him an idiot. Try not to say something that would hurt his self esteem. You might want to hold off on the wedding plans if things worsen. hope it works out for the best
My ex and i had this problem when we were still together, sometimes you have to let him go. if he acts like this it means he doesnt care. might sound harsh...but its true, it seems like he wants to hurt you or, in the great case of my ex, he wants YOU to be the one to break up with him because he doesnt want to hurt you. what i'd do, reguardless of a fight or not, confront him and tell him he needs to stop and you will not be treated like that and if he doesnt love you enough to care to make an effort then he needs to go reguardless of what he is on good days. dont ever let what a guy says keep you from thinking you are an amazing person. im sure you are and if he doesnt realize it, he needs to go
its probally hard but let him go
his not worth itmakeup class
Step 1. Tell him EXACTLY how you feel.
Step 2. Give him the chance to change or adapt to your needs while
guiding him and applying to same process to his needs.
Step 3. If he doesn't choose to, find a new boyfriend.
Simple.My boyfriend fights a lot with me and talks bad about me sometimes i also need relationship advice please help?
Find another bf. This guy has problems. Why put yourself through all his BS?
You're engaged to him? Why? You like fights? You think this is all going to magically change? He's got to change his behavior. It's unacceptable. It disrepectful. And where is your self-respect?
You're marrying him but you don't know what's wrong with him? Hello? Ask yourself why you are setting yourself up for misery and failure.
In a loving relationship the following tips may be useful to everyone -
路 Know yourself and be honest with yourself and love yourself -- first! Only then can you truly appreciate and love someone else.
路 Take good care of yourself. Treating yourself with respect and love is as important as respecting and loving your partner. Conduct yourself with dignity, even if you're very familiar with one another.
路 All good relationships are based upon mutual respect. If you do not feel respect for your partner, or believe your partner is losing respect for you, then consider ways of rebuilding it immediately. Respect is the key. If you have true respect for one another, then nothing can go wrong. You just have to find the right person to respect, this is the hard part.
路 Ask questions, clarify, don't assume. Do not talk if your mind is not clear or full of anger. When you feel hurt, do not say ';you don't love me / you never loved me'; or ';let's break up'; or ';when do you want to break up?';. You will regret one day. Tell him or her you feel hurt, and ask for clarification first.
路 Be the first to tell your partner, either positive or negative. Trust is as essential as respect. If you want your partner to trust you, trust him or her first. Letting your partner play guessing games may lead to misunderstanding and frustration. But, don't just tell him or her the issue, also talk about your plan to solve it.
路 Strike while the iron is cold. Know when to be reflective and invoke principles. When the house is burning is no time to teach fire safety principles.
路 Communicate with your partner. Without communication, there is no relationship. Stay in touch by, for example, calling your partner even if it's just to say 'hi' and 'I love you'.
路 Avoid any activity that could cause your partner to experience doubt, suspicion or distrust - build your credibility and earn trust and respect by always communicating truthfully and proactively, and always keep your words.
Hi dear you know what find a very good time and talk to him about his behaviour and how its affecting you give him some one week to see if there will be any change.If there isnt any change then dont waste your time please get out of the relationship cuz this is a sign of an abusive relationship to be so if you want to be verbally or physically abused in the future and if you wish for a bright future for your children then pls take precaution
I just found this great ebook been given out free. Its written by a relationship expert. It tells you clever techniques you need to know about approaching your crush, how to get their number and how to keep them yours and a bonus section includes a smart method to get your ex back and hes giving it out free for a very limited time so take advantage of it, please download it here while its still here http://rds.yahoo.com/**http%3a//www.bit.ly/WRQut
This is a horrible situation to be in, I have been in the exact same situation with a friend...and I'd hate to be the one to tell you, but he is a manipulatorative person, and you're pretty much locked in this relationship, and won't be happy until you state your mind! I know, he won't be 'happy' when he realizes he hasn't got you under complete control, but you are your own person, and a relationship is about supporting the other person, as well as being your own person, I cannot fret enough that you really really have to state your opinion in this relationship, otherwise one day you will just crack, and really hurt him. I know, your probably thinking ';I dont want him to be mad etc'; but EVERY relationship must include fights for it to be healthy, no matter how much you don't want to hear it. He most likely won't leave you for bringing it up, thats ridiculous, but IF he did (which he won't) you know hes not good for you. If hes like this now.. imagine what he could do to you later. Specially if he is bagging you out to YOUR friends, you need to confront him and tell him your p***ed off, because you have a right, and please don't be afraid, because I was for many years with my friend, and I was trapped under her wing, not being my own person until I just CRACKED and we had a massive fight almost tearing apart our friendship. Yet, now that she knows, its gotten better.
He may feel that you are verbally attacking him which could be why he's being so defensive. He might also think that by dissagreeing with him or giving him your opinion that you consider yourself more intelligent than he is. I know it sounds kinda crazy but I've been in a similar situation and that was the case. The best thing you can do is talk to him and see what's going on inside his head. It's likely that your fiance is sensitive and doesn't like being told what to do because he thinks that you consider him an idiot. Try not to say something that would hurt his self esteem. You might want to hold off on the wedding plans if things worsen. hope it works out for the best
My ex and i had this problem when we were still together, sometimes you have to let him go. if he acts like this it means he doesnt care. might sound harsh...but its true, it seems like he wants to hurt you or, in the great case of my ex, he wants YOU to be the one to break up with him because he doesnt want to hurt you. what i'd do, reguardless of a fight or not, confront him and tell him he needs to stop and you will not be treated like that and if he doesnt love you enough to care to make an effort then he needs to go reguardless of what he is on good days. dont ever let what a guy says keep you from thinking you are an amazing person. im sure you are and if he doesnt realize it, he needs to go
its probally hard but let him go
his not worth it
I'm having a very hard time getting over a relationship. Any advice, please?
I am having an extremely difficult time getting over a past boyfriend. We were together for about a year and a half, and spoke every day, and saw each other often. I find myself thinking about him a lot, and I just start crying at the drop of a dime. It's only been a few days, so I'm hoping it will get better, but it seems to only be getting worse.
Should I seek counseling or even consider medication? I'm just really depressed.
Or, are there other things that I could try to do to help me not be so sad? Please help: any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you.I'm having a very hard time getting over a relationship. Any advice, please?
Don't worry. In time you will forget about him. But don't expect for it to happen right away. You were with him for a year and half, so how can you forget all about him so soon. It's okay for you to cry and feel bad about your breakup. Let the tears flow, think of him, and let it all out. You will see that one day you say to yourself,';Hey I haven't thought about him at all today.'; Then you will know that you're getting over him. Stay busy. If you work, good. Go out with your friends and have a good time but don't try to start another relationship right away. Give yourself time to heal before you think of someone else. I promise things will get better. Time heals all wounds. I know. I've been through it. Give it time,honey. That's all you can do. Don't try medication yet. That should be your last resort. Good luck. Stay strong.I'm having a very hard time getting over a relationship. Any advice, please?
I have been there. the only thing that has helped me was time to get over it and realizing that i wasnt the one who messed up.
Should I seek counseling or even consider medication? I'm just really depressed.
Or, are there other things that I could try to do to help me not be so sad? Please help: any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you.I'm having a very hard time getting over a relationship. Any advice, please?
Don't worry. In time you will forget about him. But don't expect for it to happen right away. You were with him for a year and half, so how can you forget all about him so soon. It's okay for you to cry and feel bad about your breakup. Let the tears flow, think of him, and let it all out. You will see that one day you say to yourself,';Hey I haven't thought about him at all today.'; Then you will know that you're getting over him. Stay busy. If you work, good. Go out with your friends and have a good time but don't try to start another relationship right away. Give yourself time to heal before you think of someone else. I promise things will get better. Time heals all wounds. I know. I've been through it. Give it time,honey. That's all you can do. Don't try medication yet. That should be your last resort. Good luck. Stay strong.I'm having a very hard time getting over a relationship. Any advice, please?
I have been there. the only thing that has helped me was time to get over it and realizing that i wasnt the one who messed up.
A little bit of relationship advice please?
I'll try and do this quickly!
I'm being honest here, I don't have much relationship experience and unfortunately I'm entering one right now thats rather complicated.
So: Theres a wonderful girl, she was in a relationship for 1 1/2 years with a guy who treated her kind of badly and shes come out of it alright (took a few attempts but she eventually decided to get away from him) Now we had been friends for a few months previous and there was a bit of a spark but we never did anything.
So she comes out of the relationship, about two months later I ask her on a date and things go well. She has some intimacy issues so I haven't really been able to do anything besides hug her occasionally. After our date she tells me she doesn't want to get into a boyfriend/girlfriend thing (yet) and wants to see other guys. This left me hurt but I could understand because her previous relationship left her a bit exhausted. A part of me took it as a nice way of saying ';lets just be friends';....
Fast forward two months!
We stay in contact and see each other once or twice, I let her know exactly how I feel about her (that i'm mad about her) and she essentially pushes me away completely. I did something I'm not proud of, I asked to pick between seeing me or seeing other guys. She picked other guys.
She was very annoyed at me and later admitted she was upset for the entire week about it and felt like I had betrayed her trust, I felt like an asshole. We talk again about a week later and she explains a massive amount of stuff to me and explains a lot of issues she has (I mean, she tells me a lot and more than she tells her closest friends which made me feel like she really, really trusted me) She is extremely busy (for reason I won't go into but its college) and tells me that essentially when the Summer comes she might feel ok pursuing her feelings for me and tells me she isn't seeing other guys at the moment (which I let her know relieved me, she told me she got jealous when I saw someone else and I let her know that I felt jealous when she was seeing other guys)
It all seemed fine, and we would kind of playfully flirt and text a lot but not see eachother much (literally once every two-three weeks, she doesn't see any one much more often than that.....) She admits herself that she has a lot of problems and is kind of neurotic. Admittedly i'm not as bad as she is but i'm certainly a bit neurotic (i'm posting my worries on a public website looking for advice off people I don't know ain't I?)
At this stage, I felt like we were progressing and I honestly don't mind waiting around for her to feel comfortable, I let her know all this.
But then I was weird, I checked out a profile she has on a social network and found that (only very recently) she has constantly started talking to lots of random guys from her college literally until 3 in the morning some nights, some very flirty and some casual. I'm just left worrying...
She knows it would bother me, and If I was doing it it would certainly bother her a lot more.
All I know is, she doesn't put much priority to me. That would really annoy me under most circumstances but its her honesty and that she has issues which makes me feel like its not so bad.
Like I said, don't have much relationship experience (would go as far as to say i'm a klutz!) so maybe this is just the usual growing pains? We have a lot of fun, she does like me, I like her and where before she used to closed off to the idea of a relationship (I believe she actually said it terrified her) she now feels more open and is slowly getting there. The flirting with other guys online thing just makes me uncomfortable, and makes me wonder what she could be doing when she's not online. It kind of damaged my trust of her....
Pfft...anything else.... she definitely has an inferiority complex if that makes anything make sense? I don't know, to me its really complicated and I don't quite understand some of it. If you have any advice at all, let me know.
Thats it essentially...... the way I've written it makes it seem so silly... but people If you have an insight tell me:
Maybe I'm being stupid waiting around for her, trying to put pressure on her when she obviously wants out and I'm over eager trying to become her boyfriend. If a girl likes you, it doesn't take months and months to get to kiss her!
or
I should be there for her, help her get past her issues and do my damn best to let her know she's important to me and let her know that although I'm looking for a relationship I'm not trying to rush her into anything.
I've thought about it and over-analyzed it, my fear is that I'm falling in love with her and that really the clock is ticking away until she decides she wants some other guy and i'm left really hurt. I was thinking positively but seeing her flirt with literally six different guys at once, none of whom I know just made me feel small and like I didn't matter to her. A third posA little bit of relationship advice please?
I think she's basically already told you she doesn't want to get into a relationship with you, she doesn't make the effort to see you more than once every few weeks, shes talking to other guys..
i think its safe to say that she's just not that into you.
And it's time to move on.
What you may see as flirting just may be her friendly personality, and if she's already said she doesn't want to pursue a relationship with you, then take it at face value and hear what she's saying.
Don't think, oh well she's a little messed up she just wants to have fun, she had a bad relationship, blah blah blah.... b/c all you're doing is making excuses for her and her behavior when you just need to face the reality that she just doesn't see you like that.
I mean when you DID say me or other guys, she said other guys! I don't know what more you want. She sounds like she's a game player and I do honestly believe you're going to be the one who's left out in the cold and hurt, not her.
You've already tried to tell her how important she is to you and she's heard it. She knows it, and she's done nothing about it but flirt with other guys from her school until the wee hours in the morning.
Move on, and spare yourself the heartache.
I'm being honest here, I don't have much relationship experience and unfortunately I'm entering one right now thats rather complicated.
So: Theres a wonderful girl, she was in a relationship for 1 1/2 years with a guy who treated her kind of badly and shes come out of it alright (took a few attempts but she eventually decided to get away from him) Now we had been friends for a few months previous and there was a bit of a spark but we never did anything.
So she comes out of the relationship, about two months later I ask her on a date and things go well. She has some intimacy issues so I haven't really been able to do anything besides hug her occasionally. After our date she tells me she doesn't want to get into a boyfriend/girlfriend thing (yet) and wants to see other guys. This left me hurt but I could understand because her previous relationship left her a bit exhausted. A part of me took it as a nice way of saying ';lets just be friends';....
Fast forward two months!
We stay in contact and see each other once or twice, I let her know exactly how I feel about her (that i'm mad about her) and she essentially pushes me away completely. I did something I'm not proud of, I asked to pick between seeing me or seeing other guys. She picked other guys.
She was very annoyed at me and later admitted she was upset for the entire week about it and felt like I had betrayed her trust, I felt like an asshole. We talk again about a week later and she explains a massive amount of stuff to me and explains a lot of issues she has (I mean, she tells me a lot and more than she tells her closest friends which made me feel like she really, really trusted me) She is extremely busy (for reason I won't go into but its college) and tells me that essentially when the Summer comes she might feel ok pursuing her feelings for me and tells me she isn't seeing other guys at the moment (which I let her know relieved me, she told me she got jealous when I saw someone else and I let her know that I felt jealous when she was seeing other guys)
It all seemed fine, and we would kind of playfully flirt and text a lot but not see eachother much (literally once every two-three weeks, she doesn't see any one much more often than that.....) She admits herself that she has a lot of problems and is kind of neurotic. Admittedly i'm not as bad as she is but i'm certainly a bit neurotic (i'm posting my worries on a public website looking for advice off people I don't know ain't I?)
At this stage, I felt like we were progressing and I honestly don't mind waiting around for her to feel comfortable, I let her know all this.
But then I was weird, I checked out a profile she has on a social network and found that (only very recently) she has constantly started talking to lots of random guys from her college literally until 3 in the morning some nights, some very flirty and some casual. I'm just left worrying...
She knows it would bother me, and If I was doing it it would certainly bother her a lot more.
All I know is, she doesn't put much priority to me. That would really annoy me under most circumstances but its her honesty and that she has issues which makes me feel like its not so bad.
Like I said, don't have much relationship experience (would go as far as to say i'm a klutz!) so maybe this is just the usual growing pains? We have a lot of fun, she does like me, I like her and where before she used to closed off to the idea of a relationship (I believe she actually said it terrified her) she now feels more open and is slowly getting there. The flirting with other guys online thing just makes me uncomfortable, and makes me wonder what she could be doing when she's not online. It kind of damaged my trust of her....
Pfft...anything else.... she definitely has an inferiority complex if that makes anything make sense? I don't know, to me its really complicated and I don't quite understand some of it. If you have any advice at all, let me know.
Thats it essentially...... the way I've written it makes it seem so silly... but people If you have an insight tell me:
Maybe I'm being stupid waiting around for her, trying to put pressure on her when she obviously wants out and I'm over eager trying to become her boyfriend. If a girl likes you, it doesn't take months and months to get to kiss her!
or
I should be there for her, help her get past her issues and do my damn best to let her know she's important to me and let her know that although I'm looking for a relationship I'm not trying to rush her into anything.
I've thought about it and over-analyzed it, my fear is that I'm falling in love with her and that really the clock is ticking away until she decides she wants some other guy and i'm left really hurt. I was thinking positively but seeing her flirt with literally six different guys at once, none of whom I know just made me feel small and like I didn't matter to her. A third posA little bit of relationship advice please?
I think she's basically already told you she doesn't want to get into a relationship with you, she doesn't make the effort to see you more than once every few weeks, shes talking to other guys..
i think its safe to say that she's just not that into you.
And it's time to move on.
What you may see as flirting just may be her friendly personality, and if she's already said she doesn't want to pursue a relationship with you, then take it at face value and hear what she's saying.
Don't think, oh well she's a little messed up she just wants to have fun, she had a bad relationship, blah blah blah.... b/c all you're doing is making excuses for her and her behavior when you just need to face the reality that she just doesn't see you like that.
I mean when you DID say me or other guys, she said other guys! I don't know what more you want. She sounds like she's a game player and I do honestly believe you're going to be the one who's left out in the cold and hurt, not her.
You've already tried to tell her how important she is to you and she's heard it. She knows it, and she's done nothing about it but flirt with other guys from her school until the wee hours in the morning.
Move on, and spare yourself the heartache.
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